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May 7, 2005
Waiting and waiting summore
Yesterday after I woke up from my afternoon nap I was feeling crampy. I just kept going because I thought if I kept it up my contractions would get stronger. And so I cleaned and organized and I walked and busy busied myself. But nothing was so memorable that I was watching the clock. I finally rested until 10:30 and got up and walked around summore. We went to bed and I was a little scared. Strange but true, I wasn't too crazy about going into labor in the middle of the night. Waiting and waiting for pain to start is more terrifying to me than the process. With Josiah I had a few days like this, on and off cramps that were never very memorable, then my water broke and off we went. I would like this to happen again, and chances are it will. I slept poorly last night and woke up in the morning with no evidence of labor happening. Today I was so discouraged. I didn't want to get out of bed but it hurts too much to stay in bed.
Josiah has been being very difficult since my mom has been here. He finally has stopped whining for attention after I had a talk and a spank yesterday. Something about spanking my boy over and over in front of my mom is not easy. Even though we were spanked as kids, I dunno, I just would rather not. I mean, that makes sense, I don't enjoy hitting my kid. But I enjoy even less my son being impossible and not listening to me. But what's worse has been Josiah getting out of bed over ad over at night and opening our door like it's morning. We haven't been consistent in this area. This scenerio is a prime example of being consistent all the time, all the time. Joel and I have both been a little lazy and weak. Especially since Mom's been here to help. All I want to do is keep him in his room, I honestly don't care if he gets out of bed at 5am, as long as he stays put. We lead him back to his room, use stern voices, "No, Josiah, do not get out of bed!! That's bad. Go to sleep." And he gets a spanking. He gives us a grin like,"Hi Mama, good to see you!" Even after I spank him a few times! Original sin, willfulness, whatever. I'm praying that something changes fast.
On the happy side, besides the fact that Josiah is getting better about whining, he now says,"Eden!" and pats my belly. We say,"Where's the baby?" and he lifts up my shirt and kisses it practically smothering himself. And he sings all the time, that's gold.
Mom has kicked it into high gear and it making me curtains!! Hoorah! No more beach towel over my kids window! And my dining room will have lovely navy blue curatins to hang on the curtain rod! It's amazing to me how much curtains cost and they don't even exactly fit your window.
I'm honestly dreading going to church tommorrow and having everyone say,"your still pregnant!!" Yes. I hate it. I want to see my little girl so badly. I want this to be over. So does Joel and my mom.
My dad sent my mom and me pretty flowers today--Thanks Dad. We feel the Luv.
family | By | 10:35 PM
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Comments
I remember wanting them to put Maddie back in!!! In my opinion I wasn't sufficiently fit for motherhood until the 40 week mark!
Posted by: Carrie Caudle at May 8, 2005 1:42 AM
