June 18, 2008
I feel like I've abandoned my blog for other, less stimulating, things, but when I log into MT4 I realize that I pretty much blog every 3 days, so what's the big woof? I feel like there is alot I want to share and work through. How much these lazy summer days just make me stop and count my kids freckles a little more often. How Josiah asking me to snuggle isn't inconvenient at all. Bedtime changes from day to day and I watch the days on the calendar flit by. The tickers on this blog and on my Google homepage remind me how fast summer goes by. Fourty days til the beach, 14 weeks pregnant. Oh man, what will August bring, what will December bring? How will I ever get motivated to paint again? Will I ever clean my bathrooms? Replace my shower curtain? Finish unloading random art supplies on ebay? Will I gain 45 pounds or 25 pounds with this pregnancy? Will the Lord return before I have to worry about any of this?
I know, I'm a crazy person. Chalk it up to the pregnancy, I've been crying like my whole life is a Hallmark card commercial.
I cried like a baby when that
brat kid disrespected me on the playground.
I cried at Blue Skies picking out father's day cards (thank God it's summer and sunglasses hide all. And isn't it also nice during those times that you're almost always are looking down at little people therefore your eyes welling up is not so noticeable?).
I cried writing the father's day cards.
I cried giving the father's day cards.
I cried reading Linda's post about her dad's painting.
I cried at Laurel Snow on Sunday when I realized I just couldn't make out whether that big ass stick was a snake or a stick.
I cried with Joel when he said it was Ok to cry about the scary stick.
I cried after Josiah did an awesome job on his eye chart at the doctor's! (I mean it was so charming, "Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's an F. Yeah F")
I cried when Jos peed his pants at the Aquarium today because he was having so much fun with Gus he just couldn't pay attention to his bladder!
And I cried a minute ago when Joel told me he's going on a bike ride tonight and has manditory overtime in July.
Welling up on overtime too.
I have to stop and just be thankful. Thankful that the mundane and everyday is alright. I would love a vacation, but that will come and I will have sooooo much work to do before and after. But I will have sooooo much fun. Motivation is not something that is always easy to conjure up. I have to force myself to paint, just like I have to force myself to do the dishes, organize my lesson plans, consistantly discipline my kids. I am thankful that I have these things. I am thankful that I do not just serve myself. Because when all my responsibilities are gone, I'm itchy.
I have had an answer to prayer that not everyone will understand. I have had my large Metro paintings sitting in my livingroom since Clothesline's end and I have no where to put them. I prayed in a rather non-chalant way, Lord, help me find a place to put these things. And it wasn't two days or more that Smart Furniture called me asking about original art to hang in their showroom/studio (if you're not part of AVA's artist directory you should be, that's how they found me). They took 6 pieces of mine and they will be opening on Saturday to the public. I hope to not have to store these paintings again. Now that my easel is not encumbered with finished artwork, I am able to gesso and plan my next pieces. First of which will be some more Jefferson Heights pieces. I hope to squeeze some kinda "fortune" out for Art.a.ma.jig. Maybe I need to pray summore, it seems to work really well. Believe me, I have no doubts that what I do artistically is exactly what God wants me to be doing. Stay tuned.
Thanks for sharing this Katie.
Oh the joy of female emotions. I've decided to just embrace the tears, there's no stopping them anyway. Better than holdin them in. Enjoy these slower summer days until number 3 shows up!
Posted by: Linda at June 19, 2008 11:50 AM
Girl, you said it so well.
Posted by: lynnp at June 19, 2008 12:52 AM