Posted by katiek at 11:49 AM | Comments (2)

September 24, 2008

No Mysteries

This morning I was thinking about my past two pregnancies and I realized there has been a running theme. I have had a pretty heavy emotional period through each one. My first pregnancy started while we were in Norway and ended just a couple months out of living in my In-laws home, not knowing where we were going to live. I was a wreck! "When Lord, when would we have what we needed to be a family?" I spent almost every morning sleeping in late and every evening trying to make art and trying to get over little things that I experienced through the day with members of my family that were living so close in proximity to me. I did alot of crying, and praying. Poor Joel.
My pregnancy with Eden I had a friendship/mentorship totally fall apart. This relationship came to a blunt confrontation (which unfortunately happened over the phone) and then that was it. These friends got divorced and entered lives that are heart-breaking and difficult. I don't know if Joel and I are throughly over that experience. It definately has changed how we give ourselves to some folks. I cried alot, and blamed Joel for taking sides, and I could not shake the grief. This is not normal for me.
So since I blogged about my heaviness of spirit I have been working out step by step where this sadness come from. I have no large emotional trauma to pin it on, but life sure has changed alot. Some days I have to fight back tears I miss Josiah, and I want him home. And then I remember that I am still in charge of him and Joel and I are raising him up. He's being trained to be a student by those who are talented to do so. Just like I am training young artists to learn how to see all over again.

I am trying to kick myself in the pants and get motivated. Some motivation is important, like basic cleaning, nuturing, relating to the family. My hours are booked with daily tasks, from going to and from school to squeezing in an hour to make art while Eden puts eyes, carrots and fluffy tails on bunnies. Have I told you how much I love my daughter? She makes this pregnancy such a joy! She is patient, gentle, turns off the TV, and she has the funniest little conversations with me and with herself. Eden is a blessing, and she's beautiful. My stress level declines as I play with her hair.
My nesting intinct curbs the ambition I typically have to pursue bigger art opportunities right now. The sting I left Clothesline with has been shaken off and my confidence restored. But that sting does not give me any adrenaline to go shop myself. It takes an artsy neighborhood with a multitude of events to keep me off of the couch and a few feet over at the dining table painting something for the next event. I really should be doing that now. But I also should be cleaning my bathrooms. Time by myself at Niedlov's with a scone and some chai is so worth it.

I'm telling myself that that lack of ambition is totally ok. Giving time to myself to sleep before 11:30pm is very unusual, but my body just says STOP. Meet the deadlines. Clean the bathroom in little sections. Twist my fingers through my daughter's hair. Hug on Josiah a little bit longer every afternoon. Be glamorous and social when it's convenient, not when it's available. And say "no" and "it's Ok" to more things than my non-pregnant nature will allow. After all, I'm almost 32, and I got a lot more life to work, live and be ambitious. Let those folks who aren't Tessa, Eden and Josiah's mama have a turn. I'm going to enjoy this time that I can move slowly. Thanks for loving on me everyone.

Posted by katiek at 9:21 AM | Comments (0)

September 5, 2008

I could go for this kinda homeschooling!

Eden is definately less of a "action" kid than Josiah. She still gets stir-crazy and loopy when she's bored, but I can accomplish some wonderful homespun fun with Eden. Josiah was never into projects that much, even though I tried over and over. Of course I am so proud of Josiah's latest family portraits. Go take a look at how much hair I have, kinda close to life!

I have been trying to finish up a small portrait of Eden for Clothesline. Dunno how sellable that is, but...Anyway the full portrait turned out bad and I cropped it, we'll see if I use it. So Eden paints Hello Kitty (thanks again for that birthday present Amber) and I am painting Eden!

Our fun craft today (since the Prev's battery is dead) was to make peg dolls. I bought these this summer but I knew that the only time I could truly use them was when I had Eden alone. I mixed skin tones and Eden painted the heads. I put faces on and Eden decided what color and style hair each doll got. We used wool felt odd scraps. I bet other people actually have yarn, but since I'm not a knitter...I cut out odd pieces of fabric and Eden glued on most of the dresses. While she was gluing, I took a little Micron Pen and drew shoes on the stands. My favorites are the fat little feet with flip-flops.

We quickly found a little house and bed for them. Eden took off all their shoes for "quiet time" and squeaked the highest squeaks ever for the dolls voices. Little girls are so comical that way. I had a nice piece of board that looked like a mini dance floor and Eden proceeded to have them dance all around. Looked like a regular "It's a Small World".

Eden is very proud of them, and yeah, so am I.

Posted by katiek at 1:37 PM | Comments (1)

June 25, 2008

Feeling my branches reach up

So it takes until the end of June for my tired self to reach up to that creative place and shake of the dust and dross and decide that just consuming is not OK. If I want to have kids and involve them in what I know how to do and what makes me excited I have to get some fun project stuff for them to do. If you're anything like me, stepping into a craft store is the temptation of a life time. Stepping into a school supply/artsupply/homeschool resource store is even more dangerous! But I restrained myself. I left with only one pack of stickers. I turned down the magnetic travel bingo game, the jumpnropes, the telling time kits, the chia pet heads and just stuck to my original goal: Get the kids some at home projects. They must be age appropriate (i.e. not just something I want to do) and I will not buy it if they aren't into it. We made a volcano today out of self-hardening clay. Josiah has been asking to do this ever since Ms. BethAnn did it at school. And the best part is this is a multi step process that we can do over and over! We paint it, let it dry. We make little trees and houses. Then we add the baking soda and vinegar and let it explode over that over!!! Josiah was over joyed with the science section at the School Box store today and I must admit, I am a science junkie too. I remember my 8th grade Neptune project, ahhhh I loved that Newsweek magazine with Voyager pictures. He wanted the flashy fancy solar system kits and I told him that everything could be done at home. I did find a $3 double sided kit that we could do a mobile with. So we did that after we molded the volcano.

These little peg people are the things I am dying to play with. I just hope Eden loves them as much as I do. For $1.99 I got 8 peg people with stands. I remember seeing on Kiddley, or Loobylu about Amelia J and Claire doing these peg dolls and I think my daughter would love it! Dresses made of swatches of fabric glued on, painted faces, yarn hair. Perfect. I can't wait! They would make great soldiers too....

I listened to a little Graham Cooke yesterday to get my bearings after all the Lakeland busy-ness keeps buzzing all around me. It gave me the itch to start my fortune painting for Artamajig. I can't keep anything secret. I'm hoping that a weekend in Lakeland will inspire me to find some text to add to this one. It's the image of a fortune teller in a dark alley in Tokyo. It has some great contrast. I can't wait to see how it comes out.

Posted by katiek at 4:09 PM | Comments (1)

June 18, 2008

Gently

I feel like I've abandoned my blog for other, less stimulating, things, but when I log into MT4 I realize that I pretty much blog every 3 days, so what's the big woof? I feel like there is alot I want to share and work through. How much these lazy summer days just make me stop and count my kids freckles a little more often. How Josiah asking me to snuggle isn't inconvenient at all. Bedtime changes from day to day and I watch the days on the calendar flit by. The tickers on this blog and on my Google homepage remind me how fast summer goes by. Fourty days til the beach, 14 weeks pregnant. Oh man, what will August bring, what will December bring? How will I ever get motivated to paint again? Will I ever clean my bathrooms? Replace my shower curtain? Finish unloading random art supplies on ebay? Will I gain 45 pounds or 25 pounds with this pregnancy? Will the Lord return before I have to worry about any of this?

I know, I'm a crazy person. Chalk it up to the pregnancy, I've been crying like my whole life is a Hallmark card commercial.
I cried like a baby when that brat kid disrespected me on the playground.
I cried at Blue Skies picking out father's day cards (thank God it's summer and sunglasses hide all. And isn't it also nice during those times that you're almost always are looking down at little people therefore your eyes welling up is not so noticeable?).
I cried writing the father's day cards.
I cried giving the father's day cards.
I cried reading Linda's post about her dad's painting.
I cried at Laurel Snow on Sunday when I realized I just couldn't make out whether that big ass stick was a snake or a stick.
I cried with Joel when he said it was Ok to cry about the scary stick.
I cried after Josiah did an awesome job on his eye chart at the doctor's! (I mean it was so charming, "Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's an F. Yeah F")
I cried when Jos peed his pants at the Aquarium today because he was having so much fun with Gus he just couldn't pay attention to his bladder!
And I cried a minute ago when Joel told me he's going on a bike ride tonight and has manditory overtime in July.
Welling up on overtime too.

I have to stop and just be thankful. Thankful that the mundane and everyday is alright. I would love a vacation, but that will come and I will have sooooo much work to do before and after. But I will have sooooo much fun. Motivation is not something that is always easy to conjure up. I have to force myself to paint, just like I have to force myself to do the dishes, organize my lesson plans, consistantly discipline my kids. I am thankful that I have these things. I am thankful that I do not just serve myself. Because when all my responsibilities are gone, I'm itchy.

I have had an answer to prayer that not everyone will understand. I have had my large Metro paintings sitting in my livingroom since Clothesline's end and I have no where to put them. I prayed in a rather non-chalant way, Lord, help me find a place to put these things. And it wasn't two days or more that Smart Furniture called me asking about original art to hang in their showroom/studio (if you're not part of AVA's artist directory you should be, that's how they found me). They took 6 pieces of mine and they will be opening on Saturday to the public. I hope to not have to store these paintings again. Now that my easel is not encumbered with finished artwork, I am able to gesso and plan my next pieces. First of which will be some more Jefferson Heights pieces. I hope to squeeze some kinda "fortune" out for Art.a.ma.jig. Maybe I need to pray summore, it seems to work really well. Believe me, I have no doubts that what I do artistically is exactly what God wants me to be doing. Stay tuned.

Posted by katiek at 3:27 PM | Comments (2)

May 19, 2008

It's great being a Mama

Life has slowed down quite a bit. It feels good to couch and not feel guilty. Except dishes and meal planning never seem to go away. I've had some rather idyllic parenting experiences this past week. These memories are the things that make me remember why doing all the menial tasks everyday for these little boogers is worth it. Having one car, I asked my dad to take Josiah to the New City Pre-K this past Wednesday. It was great because I was able to stay in my jammies until 11am and cuddle with my sniffly daughter. Eden had a bit of a temp and we cuddled on the couch. I actually got to sleep through Curious George and Clifford! I haven't done that since Josiah was like 18 months old! I'm not the napping kind, but pregnancy requires it. Then Saturday morning Joel got up super early for a bike ride through the Battlefield with Joshie Green and friends. Eden woke up before 7, but Josiah slept in til 7:30. Eden was absorbed with all her new presents from Friday nights party so I was able to snooze a bit longer. In non-typical Josiah fashion, he climbed into bed with me quietly. No jumping or pouncing! Then after a little while he asked me if I would read his new Peter Pan book to him. We laid in bed until almost 9 reading! How wonderful! Josiah has always loved reading with me, but first thing in the morning that's crazy!

This weekend we went to Glen Falls, not once but twice! We went Saturday and the weather was gorgeous. The walk was easy on all of us, and once we got the the rocks, we had a great time climbing around. We ate out lunch that Joel packed (my man rocks) and explored. My kids loved the little cave and Josiah wanted to make it our new home and "hibernate". On Sunday, all Josiah was talking about was going back to the waterfall. Even though it was supposed to rain, and it did sprinkle on us a little, we enjoyed another day there. This time we got a little wetter. It's been years since I'd been down there, but it's definately a great substitute when your Nature Center membership has run out. I'm sure Joel plans to bring the kids out there to swim when it gets warmer.

Posted by katiek at 9:58 AM | Comments (1)

May 2, 2008

This is never fun

I've had a whole week of yuck. Morning Sickness has defined itself pretty well for this mama. I'm sick until 11am. I haven't ralphed or anything it's just pretty miserable. I remember having all these problems before but man, what's getting me these days is the responsibilities I have now. The decreased energy level is making me kinda sad. I have art I want to make, a house that's FLITHY, and two wonderful kids that I'd love to entertain but I'm toast! I nap almost every afternoon, falling asleep to the disappointment that my bathrooms are collecting more and more grossness. I can only be thankful that this sickness means that this new bun is baking pretty well. The kids have been really nice. Saying things like, "Mama, are you feeling sick?" "I'll give your sick tummy a kiss" and "Is the baby all better?". Josiah is adorable, he leans down to my tummy and says, "I love you baby". I had no idea the kids would react so well and so often.

I am hoping I can enjoy the Clothesline Show. If I feel this bad every morning and exhausted every afternoon I might hafta curl up on Laura's comfy red couch and take a snooze. The company and the relaxation will be wonderful though. And even though I have other pieces I'd like to finish, I am thankful I have plenty to show at this point.

So thank you blogland for all your well-wishes and congratulations. I still can't believe this sweet face is going to be a big sister.

Posted by katiek at 9:36 AM | Comments (4)

April 28, 2008

And then there were three

I have been putting this off for (eep) like 5 days! I have had a nervousness about it and I don't really know why. Actually, I do know why but everytime I verbalize these reasons it makes no sense. I mean, I am happy, I am excited. This is exactly what we wanted! We wanted another baby! So why am I nervous about announcing it on the blog! I dunno! I am having another bebe! YEAH!

I was getting to the point where I was I was feeling OK with just two kids, and then Joel mentioned that he had always had a feeling that he would have this certain child. That they would have a certain kind of personality. I know we can't plan any of that stuff, but my husband saying HE wanted another kid was not hard for me to go for it.

I am nervous about all the responsibilities I have now. I will teach again next fall, Josiah will start Kindergarten, Eden will start Pre-K. I have another homeschool group that wants to employ my services in the fall waaaaay up Nickajack. I also am nervous about telling the neighbors! How stupid is that! I mean, it's my life, my house, my children! We have enough room! Sorta.

We're thrilled, and a bit stunned. We didn't think that we would have a 2008 model! But we're squeaking in, Merry Christmas Baby! Whoo-Wee!

Posted by katiek at 11:19 PM | Comments (22)

March 10, 2008

Celebration of Josiah

This is Josiah hiding from me

This is him NOT showing me what he lost on Thursday night

This is him giving in after much tickling

His second tooth gone. It was a wigglin' and bloody one night and I told him, "Jos, you can pull it out if you want to, just try not to swallow it or lose it." At about 9:30 he knocked on his door and showed me the gap, "I just pulled it out Mama!". My fearless boy. He's so big, I teared up a little at this one, he was beaming with pride, dimples at their deepest. I'll keep your little tooth in the powder box that is my grandmothers with a little deer lid. And even though I'm not big into the tooth fairy, maybe I'll make you a special something to celebrate. I remember when it came in, it wasn't that long ago it seems.

Posted by katiek at 4:28 PM

December 12, 2007

We've had alot of this going on lately. Enthusiastic Eden. Lots of volume, expression, detailed commentary and drama, lots of drama. You'd think she was 3, but no, not yet. It's wonderful, I love it. SHe makes me laugh and cry and she makes me a little crazy. She's way too cute to get away with it.

Posted by katiek at 10:59 PM

October 25, 2007

Quick way to Joy

This just makes all my stresses and to-do's melt away. Finding a super easy tutorial, I mean barely a tutorial (emphasis on bare*), and making your 2.5 year old daughter a fairy tutu. Not that she needs one. Josiah wants her to be Super Eden. But whatever she decides to be on Wednesday night, she has a tutu and it brought me a good deep exhale before I go back to planning art lessons.
*this image is PG-13

Posted by katiek at 4:01 PM

August 26, 2007

Missing: one tooth

Last night as we watched "A Night at the Museum" on the grass of our Jefferson St Park, Josiah was rolling his tongue in his mouth. I said, "Josiah, don't mess with your tooth!"
"But Mama, it's gone!"
Oh crap. "Did you swallow it?"
"No, it fell in the grass"
There it goes, the tooth that should stay in for another year. But I'm thankful it wasn't something worse. He could have a big infection, or something. So his first tooth is littered somewhere in the park. The hole in his mouth shows no sign of a new one springing up. I'm also thankful that he looks old enough to lose teeth, so I"m not so concerned with what his little gappy mouth looks like. I love my boy, I wish this experience was a little more sentimental for me, but it's not. I'll leave that for tooth #2. I did poke around in the dirt a little while looking for it this morning. *sigh*

Posted by katiek at 4:52 PM

August 24, 2007

Good Morning Jefferson Heights

I'm procrastinating. There's a bunch of you readers that ask me how I "do it all" well right now I'm prcrastinating. I'm kinda writing out lesson plans, but I mostly have been enjoying coffee and watching abc shows online (dang, no new Lost and I don't like Grey's). I have been searching for images for class though. Paul Klee, Cave paintings, Frida Kahlo. Ya know the usual trash. Just kidding. Josiah took this picture before Sesame Street came on the other morning. Ah, I remember when it was just me and Jos and we would watch Sesame Street at NINE in Marietta instead of waiting for it to start at EIGHT in Chattanooga. I'm so not a morning person. But isn't that pretty, I mean, even though it was already 80 degrees out, it's a lovely urban sight.

Speaking of Josiah. Last night we went out with Cat for a looooong jaunt around town distributing Clothesline cards (still have plenty left!). And Josiah shows us, "Look at my tooth Mama!" Oh my goodness, he was wiggling it back and forth. Now, I wouldn't have been to freaked out except that it was the tooth he bruised a little while back and I had forgot about it seeing as it was given the OK by the dentist. Now, it is loose, like it may fall out in a week loose. I've been checking it to see if it's red, puffy, pussy. All that good stuff you get to do when you're a mama. It's OK except he's been fiddling with it and so it's a little different. I called Dr. Fred Whitmire because he was my dentist and he also was right next to the Passage where we were going to meet Josiah's school friends today. I thought, "hmmmm, maybe we could swim and go to the dentist" Now that just sounds to funny to me. Dr. Fred is closed on Fridays. I took the automated systems advice and called our Pediatrician. Why I didn't call my father-in-law first I have no idea, that would have been so much easier. I called Dr. Elderidge and packed the kids in the car and went swimming. The doc called me back as we exited the eletric shuttle. His main point was, "keep the tooth in, he's too young to lose teeth" Great. Just great. Because God is soveriegn and He loves me and my children soooo much I happened to get a random call from my father-in-law asking about sandals for Josiah. *BING* awesome. "Hey Dad, can I get a professional opinion from you?" Dr. K aka Grandpa Dale had some more info for me. Turns out my sis-in-law Amy, happened to lose her teeth around 4. And it does seem to happen that bruised may teeth fall out sooner. I've been praying the blood of Jesus for Josiah's tooth to stay in and not to get infected, but maybe it's time for it to come out. That makes me a little sad. But, I am thankful that the bruised one is leaving. And I must say it makes me feel diligent about keeping his teeth healthy. We'll go see Dr. Fred next week.

Posted by katiek at 5:20 PM

August 15, 2007

the little best friends I created

I was having one of my many conversations with Cat yesterday about Clothesline business and I had to stop in the middle and tell Josiah for the ump-teenth time that "Mama is talking on the phone, and I can't swordfight right now, can you please be patient and wait?" Josiah just loves LOVES to pretend to defend the household from bad guys. Stormtroopers, enemy ninjas, pirates, whomever might be attacking me while a sit and eat, check email, talk to my Mom. It's getting harder for me to want to be defended, because with this involves getting stepped on by size 13 feet, and getting jumped on by my 44in tall string bean boy. Joel of course is a team player, taking Jos out to the porch and swordfighting with plastic pipes. We go to Barnes and Noble to escape the heat, and Josiah finds the Star Wars books, the Lightning McQueen noisy books, and anything Ninja Turtle. And Eden, what a girl. She loves her brother and follows him into every adventure, carrying a kazoo upside down turning into a laser gun. Screaming with joy as she runs from invisible enemies into the nearest corner. At the bookstore today she participated in the craft at storytime coloring with delight a party hat that she promptly had me put on. She wore it proudly tucked on top of her pig-tails. And as Jos found all the adventure books he wanted, Eden sat down and opened a Disney Princess book (while I wasn't looking) and inhaled every page. She cradled an Angelina Ballerina doll and would only let it go when I suggested she found a nice quiet place for her to sit. She is a girl through and through.

When I am with my son I am able to reason and have very interesting conversations. Even when I screw up bigtime I can tell Josiah that I made a mistake and I shouldn't have spoken to him with such mean tone. Josiah knows I make mistakes, he knows I cry. I can't even hide that I'm upset from him anymore. Because he's my friend. He's with me more than my husband is everyday. I enjoy his laughter, and I enjoy his imagination. I know that he's so bored, these days before school. I wish I could find another option so he wouldn't be so restless. I had a hard time with my little friends yesterday. Too much screaming, not enough self control, too much selfishness on all of our parts.

I have to remember that even though a lot of times I am tired of being with my kids, I also have to remember that when I am older and they are grown they will be my friends if I keep them close to me. Doesn't mean we'll have everything in common, but I should try. My brother and I are very close to our parents and that must be such a gift. I want my kids to always feel comfortable to hang out with me while I work, fold my laundry, watch strange TV shows together. I created these little friends, well sorta, God knew them, I'm lucky enough to be with them so much. It's not so romantic every day, I just was reminded today, after having such a hard yesterday.

Posted by katiek at 3:49 PM

July 16, 2007

Songwriting

Last night we were putting the kids to bed and Josiah wanted to sing. He wanted to sing Zachias. "Zachias was a wee little man and a wee little man was he, he climbed up in a sycamore tree for the Lord he wanted to see. He had a sword...."
Wait, Jos, that not how it goes!
"and Jesus said Zachias, come down, I wanna fight you!"
Needless to say Joel and I couldn't hold in the laughter, and with that we encouraged Josiah's ad-libbing on children's favorites. The next verse was a rambling of how the fight took place, description of the weapons, and just random showing off because Joel and I were squeaking out "go to beds" in between giggles.

Another one of my consistant favorites is when Josiah adds a different fruit to my favorite phrase. "You're driving me Oranges!!" he says with great pride. Doesn't have the same omph as bananas.

Posted by katiek at 9:11 AM

July 10, 2007

Just Because...

I love my famiy, they make my life very giggly!

Posted by katiek at 5:00 PM

July 5, 2007

Rascal!

Our downstairs has been feeling pretty stuffy the past 3 or 4 days and we finally diagnosed yesterday that the downstairs AC was not working. The upstairs was cool and lovely, but downstairs-UGH! I was so irritated, this is a top of the line Carrier system, what the heck! So I just determined to call the builder today and get someone to look at it. When my parents came over last night for dinner I apologized for how stuffy it was, realizing how fragile even brand new things are. We ate outside and watched the local guys play soccer. Then when cruised around the outside of the house, and I asked Mom what she thought I should do if I wanted to plant my herbs along with how to beautify in front of my AC unit. Joel turned the corner around the side of the house and noticed the door of a breaker box open. Turns out our AC condensers breaker box is outside and Josiah admitted that he flipped the switch. My son in a moment of non-supervision, turned off our AC!! I'm glad I didn't have to call anyone, but maybe I"ll see about putting a lock on that door. Little rascal.....

Posted by katiek at 9:04 AM

May 8, 2007

Happy Birthday my Eden

Happy Birthday to my sweet girl Eden! 2 years old! What a beautiful girl you are. Everybody tells me this and I beam with pride and I realize my fears. But most of all, I live in the present and want to be with her and I want to be her friend. She's so cuddly and, dare I say, she's not weaned. Her personality makes it easy for me not to long for another baby. Not saying that I think I'm done, but just like my dad said the other day, "I just can't picture Eden as a middle child." She's my baby girl still and I'm good with that. I love seeing her make friends, play hard with her brother (who's twice her size). I love seeing her imitate girly things with me. I love seeing her reactions to stuff and how different it is from her 'all boy' brother. Most of all, I love listening to her talk and sing. It warms my heart to hear her learn how to communicate. I feel like I've been waiting FOREVER. She took her time on the talking thing. I can't wait to have fun conversations with her that are totally different from the ones I have with Josiah. We have this fun game we play that she starts. She says,"Heeeey Mama!" and I say, "Heeeeey Eden!" and we repeat it over and over. It makes us both smile.

It is very fun having a daughter. For those of you who don't have both a boy and a girl I highly recommend the one you're lacking. Maybe that's a wierd thing to write, but I feel very blessed to have both.

As Eden stays close to me physically, I have a peace about how she will become a strong, confident, modest, and nurturing woman. I love you my Eden, you've been an excellent experience since day one. A wonderful Mother's Day present you will always be!

Posted by katiek at 12:04 AM

April 21, 2007

Kid's Tent

At 4 Bridges, we spent most of our time right here with the facepaint, bejewelled crowns, corn dogs and ice cream!

Really an amazing festival, go! Go!! See the great art!

Posted by katiek at 5:06 PM

April 4, 2007

It's a pity to be so blue

What a beautiful day it is here in the Southeast! The weather is just amazing, crisp, sunny, happy. I am just none of those things today. Ever since last week when I helped at Josiah's Pre-K I've been battling these feelings about what to do. Josiah had a tough day at school again this week and I'm the one upset, not him. Josiah came home and told me that his teacher had to put him in time-out because he was throwing things. I really really hesitate to put this out there. But it is just so discouraging to me right now. Alli has a great little post about her boy and how she wants everyone to know how cool Fuller is. Well, Josiah oozes coolness. Everyone just loves my boy. He's charming, gentle, funny, social, he loves the outdoors, he loves babies and older kids. And he gives great monkey embraces around your neck like those stuffed animals with velcro on their hands. I love seeing his lanky frame climb up ladders or run across large grassy places. I had a huge post about all my fears but this is something that I just have to keep to myself right now.

I am not very worried. I am just feeling like a little bit of failure. I want my boy to grow and learn and it's seems hard for him. He gets really tired and goofy.
I've thought about trying some sort of music class and seeing if he thrives with that. He sings so well, he's dramatic when he sings. And when he had a chance to hold a little cello and play or toot in a clarinet he was thrilled. I also am swallowed up with fear of him not being "normal" or "accepted". I have those in quotes because none of us really are either of those things 100%. I also am washed over with the weariness of home sales and moving, mortgages and money and under all that weight is a creative little girl wanting to squeak out some art here and there. Lord help me, I'm feeling rough.

Posted by katiek at 4:12 PM

February 17, 2007

Honey soaked cuteness

Josiah took this picture of his grandpa yesterday. Dad was telling him, "Get my face, not just my belly!" And Josiah said, "I did! I did!" Josiah has a little bit of a respect problem with my Dad. Dad says that he is not much of a disciplinarian, and so he'll come tell me what Josiah has said that needs to be dealt with immediately, he's not wrong, Josiah does need to be reminded that Grandpa is Boss as well. I'm sure it's kinda confusing for Jos.

Josiah has to open the door for everyone, in fact he'll drop anything to tear across the house and open it for you as you leave. Mom and Dad have a security system that beeps when the doors open, so if you leave without Josiah opening the door he'll hear your betrayal with a little "beep beep". It gets worse when we go other places. Barnes and Noble and the Library are pretty bad. He scolded a man that was probably my dad's age who tried to be so kind and help us (all 3 of us) with the door. Josiah laid into him, and I immediately told Josiah NO and kindly told the stranger that "this is an issue with him, no worries". It's so funny how people apologize to the parents when it's obviously the child that is wrong! I mean, it's not your fault my child is a sinner and wants his own way all the time. This is where it takes guts as a parent to address the embarrassing situation with tact and sternness. I want the stranger to know that I will stand in the cold entryway of the library just to tell my son that he can not talk to this man that way and to apologize.

Josiah opened the door for my dad this morning. Saturday is Dad's big rehersal day for church services tommorrow. Josiah, still in his Pj's watches his grandpa decend the stairs, "He's going to play jazz music." I had to turn around in amazement. My son absorbs all information. "He IS Josiah! You're right! He is going to play jazz music!" I exclaim with that proud mommy tone. "He's going to play jazz music at church!" "Yes Josiah, he's going to play at church." It's taken Josiah a while to figure out that Grandpa's job is different than his Papa's job, but I think he's figured it out. And it was so cute I had to blog about it.

Posted by katiek at 8:47 AM

February 2, 2007

Four

Today Josiah turns four years old. What a wonderful 4 years it hs been. Josiah becomes more of my friend everyday. But boy whatta boy! When I found out I was pregnant with Josiah we were in Norway. We were ending our 9 month stint at a Bible school. I found out that my friends Fran and Karen were both pregnant with their first and I felt empty. I wanted to be a mom at that point right there. I prayed that God would make me willing to let down my guard and become pregnant. Well, low and behold I left my birth control at home during a month long trip away from Bergen and that was that.

We came home from Norway and after a sweet time at Cornerstone Fest, we stayed with Joel's parents working toward a life in Atlanta. And for about 6 months we stayed there and I grew very large. I became very worried that I would be putting my baby boy in a dresser drawer at my in-laws house. After bending very low Joel waited tables for a bit until he found a temp job that became permanent almost instantly. In a two week period our biggest stresses were taken care of and we were ready to have our baby boy.

Josiah was due on SuperBowl Sunday. And instead of having a baby I went to a SuperBowl party in XL maternity pants. Eight days after my due date Josiah decided to come. My water broke at 1am and we drove from Marietta to south Atlanta, about 30 minutes at 2am. I was 4cm when we got there and my midwife was impressed that I didn't want medication. I remember being very tired. The pain came when I had to change out of my clothes and into a gown. Joel and I labored together through the night and I spent too much time on the labor ball. I made it all the way through transition without drugs. The shower helped. But the hard part was getting him out.

I started pushing at 9am. My mom and Cat were there with us. I pushed for 2 hours and Josiah seemed stuck on my pubic bone. I was convinced to have an epidural and rest. It was great. I slept for a couple hours. Then we prepared to turn off the drugs and go again. I pushed for another two hours. The doctor was called in because my midwife really wanted me to avoid a C-section. We decided to use the vacuum and started to push again. It took 3 times with the vacuum I think. It hurt real bad. Then my boy was born. My 9lb 12oz boy. How did he get that big?? He was 22 1/2 inches long. No wonder he was stuck.

Although Josiah was so large he decided he didn't want to eat very well. He dropped to 8lbs 8oz by the time we left the hospital. I was a wreck. It was hard to heal, I was so torn and bruised and weak. And my baby wouldn't gain weight! But although I was so worried, no one at my father-in-laws pediatric office was worried. Because Josiah was doing all the things a healthy boy would do he was just skinny-skinny. At 6 months old he was only 13lbs 6oz. And then, with doctor's orders, we stuffed him with food and he wasn't too skinny anymore. He's pretty normal, except when he gets the stomach flu. He's looking kinda boney this week. I weighed him yesterday and he's 40lbs. I measured him and he's 43 1/2 inches tall. Whatta boy. It's good to remember and maybe some of you out there will be encouraged by our four year old story. I'm so thankful for my son. He's helped me grow into a much better woman.

Posted by katiek at 11:07 PM

January 26, 2007

Calliope

To celebrate Calliope Ann, Kelly and Micah's baby due in a few weeks. We had fun at their new house telling fun stories and sharing how good God is to us mom's. It's always great to chat with Amy and crafty talking with Michelle. Kelly married into a really sweet family. I really enjoyed the instant warmth that was there. And of course seeing little Marlow makes me smile a lot.


And since Josiah's birthday is next week (Saturday to be exact) here's his wishlist. Seriously, we don't need more toys.

Posted by katiek at 11:12 PM

January 13, 2007

Romance

Last Saturday Joel was sick and stayed home from our CDM outting with NRV and friends. It wasn't so bad for me since I had friends and loads of entertainment for the kids. I'm sure Joel was not having fun.

After 7 years of marriage and another move uprooting normalcy it is difficult for us to just relax and be with each other. There is always something we have to do, talk about, and sometimes we end up bickering about something small. We need more time alone, that's a given, we're definately planning a date this week. I love my Joel. He works so hard for the family and he plays hard with the kids. And he listens to me express the same thing over and over again. I am praying for faith that God will remind us how good He is. That He will provide even though money is tight. Today Joel let me sleep in (with no hesitation, he popped outta bed!). Then by the time I mosied downstairs he was packing them in the car to go to the Jefferson St playground. Tee-ball set in hand. So now I can blog in my pj's leisurely drink my tea (and it's still warm!, watch Clean Sweep, and after I finish this short entry. I will go down to the studio and paint a bit. This time is so special, such a sweet gift. I don't even know if he thought it would be so nice for me, it just is. My Joel, he's such a romantic.

Posted by katiek at 11:01 AM

January 5, 2007

Josiah's photos

Yes my son took these pictures and I am so proud. I didn't really look at them very closely through the view finder right after he took them, but when I loaded then a little while ago I was so impressed! The one of Marcos Counts is so simple and telling of his surroundings. And can you believe the sweet face he got out of his sister! I wish I could just freeze that face these days. Eden has been a clingy little grump lately. Cat taught Josiah how to hold her camera and push the right button. I admit that Josiah and I do not have a lot of patience with each other for me to have sat down and showed him how to be gentle and take pictures with my camera. But when he took these I knew he was holding it correctly, he was using it with respect and I was dying of curiosity to see what he would photograph. He kept saying, "I'm going to take a picture of Eden!" And he took about 5. This is the best one, most of them were in focus thanks to the daylight.


Thanks, oh blog friends, for your encouragement. I have been feeling very discouraged in many ways these days. Not that I'm going to go into it all, but it has effected the length of my posts and what time of night I write them. I am bummed about 4 Bridges, but it's not the end. I have already begun other plans of attack. My two biggest fans (Joel and Cat) both have the same idea of a renegade show that runs the same time as 4 Bridges. I think that would be fun. No need to be hostile, just intentional. We need to find a space and book it now, that would be the first thing. I'm trying to produce art through my heavy gloom and will post pics soon. I will ask though my blog community that if you think of us, pray for Joel's job. He's employed and doing fine, but he is so talented and waiting a whole year before being able to apply for new internal positions is torture. I believe that Joel will find favor anywhere he works. His employers love him, his managers trust him and ask his advice. Joel is a wonderful asset wherever he goes. Although there is a very slim chance that he would be considered for a higher paying internal position after working for BCBST for only a month and a half, God is all about slim chances. He worked an employment miracle for us in the past, He can do it again and again. I feel I have not been faithful in prayer. My wellspring of faith is very low these days. But I know that God is so faithful even when we are weak. I have been reading Proverbs to just remind myself that wisdom is something I strive for and hope that it is one of my strongest attributes. My spirit battles daily with my role as wife and mother. Trying to wrap my head around the hard work that will come because of Joels 35% pay cut, starting from scratch. Pushing me out of the nest into the working world has become a constant frustration to Joel. I thought I was a team player but my insides are upside down with worries. My children revolt when I leave them with a sitter all day. The idea of waiting tables late into the night or working very very early in the morning just plum scares me. These things are hard to admit, but I feel it's time to get it out there. I am a weak, selfish person. Unwilling to change. I am prideful about my roles in this world. I am praying for humility and/or conformation of what my spirit feel so strongly. Ok, thanks for reading all of that.

On the up-side, I will begin tutoring Cara English on Tuesday. I'll be using Mona Brookes Drawing for Older Children and Teens. I've got a supply list ready and I hope that my kids will sleep nicely through our lesson since my folks will be in Philly all next week. Next week is looking like a bear. Lots to do...

Posted by katiek at 8:23 AM

December 26, 2006

better than barfing

I am the unstoppable Mom. I mean all mom's have to be somewhat unstoppable. Mom doesn't get a day off. I remember those Robitussin ads where mom is in bed and dad is helpless. I feel kinda like that. Right now Joel, the kids, my parents, my brother his wife Sarah and their baby girl Joanna are all at the CDM. I thought I was getting better and yesterday I did the combo of pain relief and herbal cold/flu ward off tabs. I was a feverish zombie through 2 episodes of Project Runway and stumbled up to bed shivering and zonked. Great fun was had no matter what. Joel stayed up til almost 3am playing with his new Creative Zen. Josiah and Eden try with all their might to share the toys they were given.

Eden and Joanna in their matching hats

Josiah on an adventure with his new binoculars

Ah Munna Eachoo!! Threadless T for Jos

Eden in her tap-shoes


Here I am with my present. Joel and Cat got me a painting from my fellow KSU student Michelle Scott. She did a whole series called for a show "About Face" and I think they are very good. Quite a surprise, it's really beautiful.

Posted by katiek at 1:39 PM

December 18, 2006

What to do? What to do?

We sit down to dinner tonight, which is the traditional pancakes, and Dad brings up how he is willing to make Josiah's breakfast in the morning. I told him that unless someone is sitting with Josiah eating he'll just mill around anyway. So Dad said he'll just turn on the TV for Josiah until we're up and moving. Which isn't very long. Dad said,"It's not Sesame Street that's on, it's some cartoon, ya know, where the animals talk." I just lost it, so funny. Silly Grandpa Jim.

We went down to Marietta this weekend. Joel was training his replacement and we did some Christmas shopping. The kids did have a melt down when we first got there. Josiah wanted his other pillow, he talked about being afraid of the dark, he was unhappy in general. He had fallen asleep in the car and did not want to be awake at all. Poor Buddy, it makes me sad to hear him cry. These kids don't know how to react to upheaval.

We did got to our favorite Thrift Store on Saturday!! Yeah!! I found a mini white Christmas tree, a whole bag of colorful zippers, three cardigans for me me me, tap shoes for Eden for Christmas and these rockin' big star glasses. can't go wrong with those! I must say, its easy to shop in Marietta. I kinda miss that.

My recent dilema, the thing that is awkward for Joel and I to talk about is me getting a job. He has been suggesting it on and off since Josiah was of a managable age. It's not that I have refused, it just never seems worth it because I have no great job experience. Its never worth it for me to work and pay someone to watch the kids. I admire anyone who can work until 1-2am waiting tables, on their feet, coming home smelling like everything you've served that night. That takes a lot, and I'm trying to wrap my head around doing that. Because that would be the only job that would be worth while, financially. I have been kid-swapping in order to work a day job, and though that wasn't terrible, Lu-Lu is very cute isn't she! It's really exhausting though to not have an everyday pattern thats consistent. And again there is financially the reasons for it all. Joel is at the point where he would rather work 2 jobs himself than ask me yet again to get a job. I wish he wouldn't give up on me. If it weren't for him I would never show my artwork, ever. I don't want to be a disappointing wife. I want to uplift my husband and help him to work less. The kids suffer when they are babysat so much, and we do need extra money. I do not mind working, its fun to escape for a while, but I pay for it big time with crankiness, clinginess, tantrums and fighting. I need a real solution. Tutoring in art will pay a smidge but not enough, unless I had a whole class paying $25 an hour. I can make excuses all day and that doesn't help us, what will help is for my motivation to come back and to get an evening job.

Posted by katiek at 1:16 PM

November 18, 2006

Fun*

These past few days have been long and hard as Joel is interviewing someone for his position. Joel has been hired by BC/BS of TN and will start his training the Monday after Thanksgiving. We're going to drag ourselves up to Chattanooga and live with Mom and Dad Ward until our house is finished being built. So I've been going through another 'deer in headlights' moment where I kinda do little things to get kinda ready but avoid doing the really big packing. But I gotta say, we dont have to do a lot at once, and this might be a blessing in disguise. See, NO ONE has come to see our house and our real estate agent is sending us the Market is Horrible and You are Doomed letters that make you want to sell your house for a hundred bucks. But it is better in our minds to leave our house on the market at the same price (154,9) while we live with Mom and Dad and then think about dropping the price closer to the peak season of Spring. Mom and Dad already have 2 generations worth of stuff in their 1906 former travel lodge house, they dont need 3. We will leave our furniture in Marietta for brief weekend stays to shop at all the stores Chattanooga doesn't have, rake leaves, sweep up dead bugs, and Joel will train his replacement.

My days have felt kinda long, and my kids show their desire to have Papa-time. My daughter, the sweet red-headed peanut girl who is so coy and shy and precious has been testing me every evening this week. Eden has been showing me that she wants what she wants with a long clinging screech and goes on a hunger strike in further protest. Oh, my girl. She was tossing one crayon at a time on the floor until the whole box was empty. Oh, my girl. She wanted playdough, I gave it to her, she ate it. Playdough gets put away and screeching ensues. I give her a second chance, playdough goes in mouth, playdough gets put away. More screeching. But when I get her into the bath tub and she repeatedly takes a cup and fills my belly button up with bubbles that's when all is forgiven and my sweet pea returns to me.

I go to Shorter College tommorow to pick up my artwork and then transport a few of them to Dalton for their Small Works Show. I hope I can rid my collection of all PODS! Also I have put Good Morning in my Etsy shop if anyone is interested. It'll be nice after 3 days of long days with the kids to leave them with their Papa and come home to a happy reunion with my little reds. And a nice evening with our #1 all-star babysitter and buddy Roseanne.

*Birthday Bounce House from party today

Posted by katiek at 12:14 AM

November 7, 2006

Happiness

This video is a little over a year old, and since I have mastered YouTube I am trying to upload some of my faves. Enjoy a little Grandpa vs grandson magic.

Posted by katiek at 11:47 PM

October 17, 2006

Why Mom's house is like a Day-Spa

Well, that might be a lofty title. But when you go away for the weekend and stay at Mom's there are things about it that are like being served. Lately Mom's house is becoming more and more enjoyable and for a mother of two small kids, the luxuries are different.

First you get a healthy wiff of Mom's basil garden which is threatening to take over the flower bed.

You head up the stairs and pass lovely little potted ivy plants with solar powered lights that glow warmly as the sun sets.

Mom's hanging baskets are so inviting. They make you want to stay on the porch and examine what it over looks.

And inside is the warm and roomy dining room, where the traces of elder care has almost vanished, and the touches of my mother's home is blossoming as fast as she can afford it. There is almost always coffee to drink, and good coffee at that.

This visit there was chocolate birthday cake, for ME! Sorry, I have no picture because it was consumed when it was uncovered from it's Tupperware home. Mom's house has Robin Hood and Fantasia for the kids to watch. There is a grand piano that is open for plunking on, with care.

There is a room with beds prepared for the kids, so no lugging of bedding for us!

This home built in 1906 was restored and still has big windows that glow with sunlight. The hardwoods are cool on your stocking feet. The location is ideal to getting everywhere we need to go. The guest room has two twin beds, which is nice sometimes when you share a bed every night with someone else. The guest bath shower has thick fat water and perfect pressure to soak you adequately and comfortably.

Music is almost always playing, and good music too. This time it was Natalie Cole. And there are people that love us there. Who ask us if we need food, coffee, cake, conversation. There is wi-fi, there is cable TV (VH1 specials are great!). And these people, Mom and Dad, agree to baby-sit with no sighing. They bathe, feed, play, teach Bible stories, and sing songs with the kids. They are patient and let Joel and I make the rules. It's a vacation of all vacations.

So even though no one is rubbing my back with hot stones, I got to have a movie night with my husband, chocolate cake, red wine, got to go to meetings with confidence, church with no nursery worries, house hunt with company and big hugs out the door.

Thanks Mom and Dad, we had a great time! You made my 30th birthday sweet!
More on the Chattanooga weekend later!

Posted by katiek at 4:37 PM

October 12, 2006

Thirty

Happy Birthday to me! I'm 30 today. And although there are things I wish were different this year. Things I want to change, I am so thankful. I have very little wincing when I think that I'm 30. I don't feel any different. I feel different that I did 5 years ago, maybe even last year. We're a family in progress and although transition and turmoil is unpleasent it means things are growing and changing.

I wrote Helen Davis-Johnson from Arts Move last week just to see if she got my application. And some trustworthy folks had thought that maybe they were done giving away money for the year. Well, she wrote me back saying applications are accepted on a rolling basis and could I come and tour the neighborhoods sometime. I asked her if this weekend would work, and have yet to hear back, so I'll email her again. But it sounds pretty positive to me! There is so much to be worked out, but I'm hopeful, today, my birthday.

My Prev is in the shop and will be fixed by the weekend. Cuz the only other car we own that has plates, has bad plates and also did not pass the emissions test. ARGH.

My beautiful husband wants to give me something big and wonderful for my birthday, but used all his energy on my opening last weekend. He did go out before 7am this morning and bought me flowers! I also had a much needed laugh last night as I checked out the new shirts from Threadless. So funny, I swear. I bought this one for myself. I mean it makes perfect sense. The Pic of me is wearing my Threadless shirt I got a few months back it says "Purple is the new blue and red" Ha! Perfect for a Mama/Artist.

I have to admit to those of you who don't know I do have a myspace account. I'm about to go check it and see if I got any of those big gaudy sparkly "Happy Birthday" banners. Whatever. It's kinda fun, I can keep up with Thena which is great.

So for my thirtieth birthday go check out our theme song and here's a Josiah video that makes me laugh real hard.

Posted by katiek at 10:08 AM

September 20, 2006

Hummingbird

We had a lovely day on the porch the other day. And to top it off we had a few wonderful visitors! First we found a praying mantis. I seemed to be the only one who was thrilled about him. But the hummingbird that made its way through the porch door and buzzed around and chirped was the tops!! You can see how much the kids loved it. Poor think was stuck all day and evening. I kept thinking he'd find his way out! Finally around 9:30 he looked really pooped and he didn't put up much f a fight as I caught him in my large strainer and put him outside on the grass. I figured he wouldn't starve in my porch seeing as I let tons of little bugs in with the door open. What a sweet little bird. I enjoyed watching it buzz and it's chirp was so tiny. God has a wonderful imagination.

Posted by katiek at 10:52 AM

September 18, 2006

In the air

Wow, I've started to post like four times this weekend and just haven't finished. Haven't compiled thoughts enough. And something tells me I won't have much energy to post much now, but...

I must say that the air these days is just beautiful. The fall, I love it. It's the time around my birthday, it's when your jackets and hoodies comeout. It's when you want to be outoors again after an August of dog days. I love that it's raining again. I love it because when the weather is cooler I can work on the house and not drown in my own juices. I have done my share of painting, scraping, cleaning, boxing, lugging, you name it. I hope that we can call our real estate agent real soon. There's a cute little St. Elmo house that has a great price!

I'll muster up more to write tommorow. I hope you're weekends were as satisfyingly exhausting as mine and free of e-coli spinach!

Posted by katiek at 12:07 AM

August 26, 2006

Shared with no one

As my kids get older, I have found that a day at the house when there are things to do for the house just gets crazy and Joel and I end up mad at each other and the kids are bored, with a capital B. I can usually get a smidge done every day while the kids are napping. It's really only an hour and a half, but I got all the lattice painted for our new screened porch which will get started on on Monday. Joel needs bigger chunks of time to do bigger projects so I'll take the kids out on Saturday so Joel can work. Last week we went to the opening of the Dozier Centre in Kennesaw. Super fun musical instruments and clogging and free BBQ and a monsterous tiger to jump in. Great times but I went by myself. Me and the kids.

Today we went to Grant Parks Summer Shade Festival. Really neat. Lots of kids activities, free crafts, and music. Expensive food, but great music and a professional story teller! The art was better than expected too. Josiah and Eden had such a good time. But again, we went by ourselves. Me and the kids.

Joel has found a few folks on Myspace that were close friends in highschool and he has been reeling in delight emailing them and breaking into spontaneous laughter here and there reading the messages. He found Christian, amazing. Joel used his second set of Father's Day Six Flags tickets to go with his friend Christopher for the day. I detest Six Flags, so he's going with buddies. I'm happy for him, it's good for him to get a social boost!!

I am weary, weary of Atlanta. I love the special moments I have with my kids. I love having a big city to explore with all it's many attractions and opportunities. But I'm lonely. I'm tired of driving 30 minutes to see my friends. The great Exodus has taken place, and we are looking at fewer and fewer friendships. I don't like that Joel and I have one date a month! A month! And the last sitter, although she rocked, was expensive!
This post was a lot longer. Full of whining and poor thoughts. But I will stop. I know that I need to have adult interaction and I just haven't had enough this month. It will change.

Thanks for bearing with me.

Posted by katiek at 10:35 PM

August 1, 2006

Slow Motion

Ryan Adams show at the Tabernacle
We're soaking up sun and chlorine in Hilton Head. We usually leave for HH on Saturday, but instead we stayed and hired a sitter and went to a concert. It was quite enjoyable although our ears were ringing more than we'd like. Too much treble, yikes! Amy and Josh came from their grunt jobs at Cov and cat came an joined us as well. We luckily sold the last three tickets thanks to craigslist. What was life like before craigslist?? It was also cool to get together with Chris and Ann Ammons after the show. Our poor sitter stayed until 3am. Is that a major no-no? I mean, we called her before we went out for drinks, and we totally made it worth her while.

Unfortunately for our beach trip, I dropped my camera on the floor of the ladies room at the concert. It's flashing E18. We do have a warranty with Office Depot, but I did drop it. We'll see. Joel seems to think that these places don't care and they'll just give me a new camera. It is an older model. I'll be ecstatic if that happens! If not, I'm saving up for a Nikon D50. It's not like I need a lot more pictures of Hilton Head. The scenery does not change. And Josiah doesn't look that different from last year, except he's mastered the arm swimmies. Yes! I can take the 17 dollar life vest back! I'm enjoying trying my creative hand with my Pentax k1000. It's a tank and it takes great pics, even with the light meter broken. There's something beautiful about film.

Posted by katiek at 1:20 PM

July 15, 2006

Pepperings

Here's a bunch of things I've been wanting to post about, but haven't had pictures or time. Mostly they don't flow together very well. First, Josiah and my tower at the High, we finally made it back and oh baby, it was a hot hot ride. But my Sit N Stand Stroller made the trip much safer. Strolling down Peachtree with Josiah safely strapped made the humid walk worth while.

Although I do not have the opinion of a professional, yet (I say this for my husbands benefit, because he hates when I self-diagnose). I'm pretty sure we have a bat in our chimney. The other night while hearing scratching straight out of a horror movie, I grabbed a lamp and waited staring up at the flu. I just had to wait a moment or so when I saw a CLAW! Yes, a claw. I told my library buddy, Tracie, that I had a bat in my chimney and she said, "Awwwww! But they're so cute!"

I guess if they were all like this, they'd be cute. I named him 'Fifi', that's a cute name. It could be much worse. It could be many many bats! But as of last night I have heard no scratching, I hope the little guy left and didn't die. If he did, poor Fifi, it's not our fault. I did nothing to harm him, but any critters that live in this house that I did not give birth to are kinda not welcome.

I told you my dryer was kaput, and it kinda was. I did one load of laundry and then took all the random pieces of lattice, curtain rods, quarter-round and balanced them on desks and the pack n play. The clothes dried faster than in my hand-me-down dryer! The towels were a bit too crispy though. It was nice, I didn't have to go down stairs to get clean underwear, it was across the hall. It also made my office/guest smell so nice. My dryer s now fixed, and I'm glad too, the outlet was shady and God, once again, protected our family from electrocution. yikes, that's scary to think about.

Joel put up our backsplash and in the process moved the stove. When we moved it back. Beeeeeeooooooerrrrrrpppp. No more power for the stove. This was 11:30 pm. I just about lost it. Joel was just like, "Well, we'll call an electrician." I did the next morning. It's one thing to have a dryer that doesn't work, it's another thing to have a broken dryer and stove. Called the electrician and the stove was fixed before dinner.

My daughter is so funny. I have a few videos I dunno if they'll all work, but enjoy what I do have for you. Silliness for all.
Eden eating a chicken nugget. I promise I wasn't filming this while driving.
Enjoying the Deck take one. Enjoying the Deck take two.
Eden's little dance

Posted by katiek at 5:20 PM

June 7, 2006

It can't just stay on my hard drive!

I had a couple posts that had more meaning and thought, but I lost them both! So here is my photoshoot of my goodies from Papersource and Trader Joes.



Paper, cards and a stamp. One card says "How to eat a crow" I'm so dim, I had no idea what "eating crow" meant. derf. It's a fun card to have anyway.


Ghandi card and bee paper close up


My simple K. it's nice to have a repeating consanent in your name. They had a great rubber stamp collection but I couldn't find one that just popped out at me. Except there was this newborn baby stamp that was really pretty. My friend Kate M teaches Bradley Method classes (when she has a moment) and we both stood there dreaming and scheming how to use this stamp for her classes. So I just bought it for her against all her protesting. "A good stamp can not go to waste! It will come in mighty handy!" I stated with great verve. Besides, I love Kate and we've missed them, and if I can contribute to Kate's professional sucess and skills this is very small. It is a beautiful stamp and I'm sure Kate will find many uses for it. Empowering stay at home moms, one stamp at a time.


And from Trader Joes: my favorite pop up sponges and lavender dryer pouches. Mmmmm, makes my clothes smell soooo good. We snuck some Charles Shaw home too.

So many pretties, so little time. Off to meet Andrea today. Wheee!

Posted by katiek at 9:48 AM

May 8, 2006

Happy Birthday Eden!

My baby girl is one today!

The birthday hat

Presents!


How old are you Eden?

Oh, yeah. ONE!

We went to celebrate with my family, especially since Unka Kirk, Aunt Sarah and cousin baby Jo-bean, I mean Joanna were down from St Louis. We spent a lovely afternoon with Cat at Cooledge Park and Jos and Joel rode the carosel while the girls kicked back, watched giggled and toddled. An exhausting weekend, but a special one. I only wish we had more fun play time with Kirk and Sarah, kinda feel like that was my fault. Sorry guys. Maybe we can do the beach sometime! It's great to see our family grow and play. The days have arrived where my kids can play together. Many of you were reading when I wrote that I was in labor and then Eden's birth on Mothers day last year. Quite a special event, and it was a great labor/delivery. The second time was 100x easier!! No regrets. God is so good to us. I feel like we have a right-rounded family with Eden here. So nice to have two kiddies. So nice to have my petite baby girl.

More birthday fun here

Posted by katiek at 4:03 PM

April 17, 2006

Beautiful for a moment

We spent Easter Sunday with Joel's grandparents and sister, along with Amy's bf Josh and Josh's sister Amy. Since the kids were all beautiful for a moment, I wanted to snap some pictures. Eden is wearing the white dress that my grandmother smocked for her. This is the third time she's worn it and I imagine she'll wear it again and again since a very fat hem is included. Mom says that smocked dresses have a great ambiguous shoulder line so a newborn through a two year old can wear them. Good thing, because my kids only get this pretty a few times a year!

My prettiness on my flickr.

Oma and the sacrificial Lamb cake. She made us a killer meal. It was probably us that should have been serving her.

Here's the finished plate for "Art of Dining" I hear whether it got in or not sometime this week. The photo is a little too bright, it washes out some of the color, but I literally took the photo on my way to class. Title "Balm of Gilead".

Posted by katiek at 3:39 PM

February 3, 2006

3 years

3 years old today. That's my boy Josiah. Happy birthday buddy. What a whirwind and a joy you have been from the first painful moments to the months of struggle after keeping you fed. You are my ridiculously healthy son, my surprise of a redhead. With your father's facial features. Growing striaght up like a weed so all your pants are too short in a couple weeks. Your bumbly coordination has given way to full force speed and new agility. You love your world, your friends, what you get to see. I wonder through your eyes now. Everything is new to you and I delight again with new eyes how wonderful God's world is. I love to hear you sing. I hate hearing you cry, especially when your scared. You were a gift from God at the perfect time. We never doubted your arrival, gender, name or purpose. You are beloved, cherished and exhausting. I am older and wiser because of you but I am happier, more confident, free from fear and worry because I have you in my life. I watch you as your brain begins to learn more complicated things and I am a little overwhelmed with my continuing task of being your teacher and your guide. But we will do this together and God is your perfect parent. Me and your Papa are your friends forever and we'll always have time to stop what we're doing and ROCK OUT!

Posted by katiek at 10:47 AM

January 26, 2006

More fun with Felt

I know, I know I'm supposed to be working on my independant study paintings. Painting a blurry painting and figuring out when my prof is going to give me a go ahead for one of my proposals. But no, I refuse to delve into that frustrating, downer of a thought process instead I want to play with felt! Even if my boy doesn't. Last week at the High Toddler Time Jos had a blast creating about 10 beautiful monoprints. This week they did felt hats, felt anything actually. I about died when I snuck a peak into the room before we went to the bathroom. Felt! Wheeee! We sat down at Josiah's favorite spot and I could tell he'd rather play with the scissors and glue. So I ask the magic question: Should we make a guitar? I love having a birthday hat for Jos to where at his party and this just killed two birds wth one stone! I made a little make-shift hat (with much instruction from the craft organizer). And we had a flying V and a 'rock' guitar (which basically is a Fender), we had a drum, a banjo (it turned out kinda sad) and an accordian (have mercy). I also put a number 3 since I'm hoping he'll where it onhis birthday. Well, he would not wear it so dern it, I did. Here's some more pics.

Silly Mama

detail guitar

the flying V




Some of you will be receiving one of these in the mail for Josiah's 3rd. No I'm not crazy even though Joel and Jennie said I was. Yes I sewed 6 strings onto this paper Fender for Jos' invite. I am just trying to keep up with those other Mom's-that-will Hannah and Joy. Thanks for the inspiration guys! They are terribly messy with glue and I really wanted to do stamps too and glitter and Modge Podge but no, this is for a 3 year olds birthday not for my painting independant study. Doh, there's that reminder again! Then I was about to wet my pants with glee when the local US post office had these!

Perfect for invites! That sealed it for me. I was making and mailing invitations.

Posted by katiek at 5:15 PM

January 25, 2006

What I've been keeping from you

airplane


Originally uploaded by katiek2.

This is one of the many beautiful monoprints Josiah did last week at the High on Toddler Thursday. Membership has huge rewards! We made a gazillion! There all here if you want to take a look. Josiah was so contemplative as he created. He chose a table by himself and stared at his brush in awe. He rarely gets to hold one at home or he gets scolded. He worked very deliberately on each one. Some took longer than others. Some he just used water. What they did was give you tempra paint and a transparency and when the paint was still wet you squashed the paper down on it. Ahhh, it was exhilerating. I kept squeaking at Josiah in my mama voice, "isn't this fun, buddy? So awesome, So cool! We get to paint!" At one point I asked him if he was OK cuz he looked so serious. He just chirped, "I'm ok." and kept on painting. The High also has a play room which I have never known was there. Derf. We hung out in there for a while too. Not as cool as the Magic House, but it's a helluva lot more than the new GA Aquarium has for tots.

And on another squealing happy mom note: As of a week and a half ago, my boy is officially potty trained!

Oh man, just under the wire too. He's turning 3 on the 3rd (golden birthday so soon). I have found a whole new way to love my boy! I always thought I'd be so sad when he wasn't a baby anymore, but what my mom said about us when we were little keeps ringing in my ears: I enjoyed you guys no matter what age you were and I rarely wanted to go back.
Now that he's almost 3, I stare at him and remember those traumatic first weeks and I am so glad, so glad, so glad he's 3 years old now. God's faithfulness is overwhelming. I still do what I have been doing since the beginning I see older children and I am thankful that Josiah is as young as he is. I'm glad Josiah isn't 5 or 6. Cuz right now, I can only handle a 3 year old. I see him in his little guitar or Bob briefs and I just giggle. He's still little, even though he's my big boy.

I have been back on the South Beach for the past week and I have already lost 5 lbs! Yeah! The last time I did this diet I actually got down to 127 which is crazy for me to think about now. I was 145 when I started and I believe I'm 140, although sometimes it tells me I'm 139. I couldn't believe that I had reached that since it's borderline being overweight for my height. Crazy huh? I'd like to get down to 135 and if so, I'll be going through boxes trying to find my old pants! I finally got into my post Josiah jeans today and I wore them with no discomfort! My belt went up a notch! And I really dig the South Beach, I have to be creative with food. My lunch today was tofu with pesto, tomatoes and zuchinni sprinkled with parmesan all stir fried up and warm. So nice. I know there are some of you about to barf when I say tofu, but I think it's a comfort food to me and it gives me a meat and eggs break. I know the South beach won't make my skin shrink back, or my flabby abs get tight but I do feel so much better. So as I type I'm enjoying my decaf coffee and dark chocolate peanut butter.

Now on the art front:

Continue reading "What I've been keeping from you"

Posted by katiek at 4:01 PM

January 20, 2006

Valentine for me

Valentine for me
Originally uploaded by katiek2.

Posted by katiek at 8:42 AM

January 18, 2006

Finger Puppets get Hungry too

I got Josiah to eat his lentils the other night by putting on a puppet show with this charmer and his friend. Cheerios made great props, seeing as our floor is littered with them daily.

WOULD YOU WORK FOR FREE ART?

I am willing to give away artwork if I can find someone who will watch my kids for a couple hours on Friday's so I can go to school. It's really just for a couple weeks, maybe 4 Fridays max. Is there a pod series you are salivating over? Do you need to have Be Still or a pregnant nude? Or maybe just something you've seen here on New Eyes that you want. Contact me if you can help. thanks. I mean they are pretty cute.

Posted by katiek at 3:39 PM

January 6, 2006

Some sweet Morsels

Yesterday I just felt aweful, like a big gloomy cloud was hanging over my head. I was thinking too much, not letting God just work on me by himself. I stopped everything and painted. I listened to some sermons from Trinity Vineyard (thanks Jennie). Then after listening too a sermon about Love and Obedience I chewed out a KSU employee for making my life harder. How's that for love? Sheesh.

We made plans with our friends, the Worrells, to go to Re:Vision, what used to be VSN at the ATL Vineyard. Our friends Adam and Shiree Hoar are the pastors there. We have missed our friends so much. It was great to have good fellowship time. We were there until 10:45pm catching up. Much needed. It melted my blues away.

I haven't thought at all about NY resolutions. I kinda don't think there's much to them, I mean, if you're going to change why not do it Dec 31? I mean why wait? whatever. But last night I had a Eureka! moment. Ever since we came back from Norway in 02 we have been searching for a similar enviroment. Just writing that makes me feel so dumb! Why would God ever put us in a similar enviroment? Doesn't He want us to change and find the challenges and blessings in each new enviroment? Why would He want us to stay the same? In a sermon that Kris McDaniel had on Trinity's website he talked about asking God in the middle of the night for more spiritual fathers. Why couldn't he find any? What was it going to take? He then looked down at his infant daughter and realized that he was a spiritual father to this little one and his job started the day she was concieved. If you want something in your life, maybe you should step up and do it and God will bring you what you need. This made so much sense to me, this is what I need. I shouldn't be looking for leaders to fit my mold, I should be that leader (or pray to become that leader) and what I desire will come. It's not easy, but that realization gives me so much peace and makes me feel empowered and not a failure. We are all just men, with our own agenda, why should I expect to just find someone who is doing what I want? They're all doing what they think works, and it might not work for me. Being a Christian involves many freedoms that we don't think about. God made us all unique, why are so many Christians and churches doing the same thing? I'm full of critique, but I guess I should put on my running shoes.

Here are some sweet Christmas morsels for you:

Josiah dunking on his new basketball back-stop, thanks Gma and Gpa Ward!

Eden on Christms Eve, before new presents arrive, enjoying the FP Barn. thanks again, Uncle Nathan!

Mama Kate's new apron. My best friend loves me. Thanks Cat!

Posted by katiek at 3:18 PM

December 22, 2005

Why is Eden excited?

Why is my pensive and serious girl giggling? Could it be that she is getting Dolores for Christmas? Could it be the wonderful smells of molasses drenched granola coming from the kitchen? That she's going to meet her cousin, fellow girlie in crime, Joanna in a few days?

Or is she just high off teething tablets...We'll never know, but it's fun to watch.

Posted by katiek at 5:14 PM

December 15, 2005

On her way to stardom

So I got together with some of my bestest buds this weekend. Cat and JenK came down to rescue me from boredom. We went to Whole Foods and The High and Lynn and her boys joined us at IKEA. In between we took care of kids and played with them too. We drank lots of coffee and made cookies. It's cool to feel so comfortable with my girls. They cleaned my kitchen while I put the kids to bed. I knew they wouldn't care if my floors were dirty or if the kids kept us from hanging out a little bit longer somewhere. And the 7am wake up calls from Josiah were not so annoying when I had two other sleepy faces to enjoy his cheeriness with. I wish I had gotten more pictures, but here are some from IKEA. Some of my faves:

Some guy who has an "I love IKEA" website wrote me and asked if he could post Eden's picture on the website for the "IKEA cuteness factor Mondays". I guess he posts a new one each week, this past week it was a cat. Eden is already turning heads!

Here's the pretty thing in action in her latest film: This Bag is Not a Toy!

My brother and his wife Sarah are at the hospital trying to get my niece out. They're trying some pitocin before they break water. Let's pray that she makes an entrance. I told my brother that everything will work out and Sarah will do great and that little girl will show up today. He kinda herumphed over the phone, but according to Lynn I have extreme skills in the department of declaring babies to be born. hehehe. I talked to God and asked Him to bring baby girl Ward by 6pm tonight. Maybe that's reaching for a first baby, but 6pm is a nice time to give birth.

Ah, my daughter went to sleep. Mom 2 kids 0. Mom's the Champion! Now to reheat my tea.

Posted by katiek at 4:47 PM

Just 30 minutes please

Between my son and my daughter I am running laps up and down the stairs. Wait, lemme do one more....Ok I'm back. Neither one of them wants to nap. And that's all I'd like to be doing on these dusky rainy afternoons. Yesterday it was Josiah fighting hard with manipulating requests for the potty, and his dad, and books, and milk. whatever he could think of. He was obviously tired nothing else throws him into hysterics like fatigue. I know naps are winding down for him. He used to sleep 3 hours every afternoon, now it's more like an hour and a half. I know, I know, some of you moms are like "Count your blessings!" I am and now I realize I'm spoiled.

My beautiful daughter does not sleep anywhere near as much as her brother used to. I used to have a 2 hour nap in the morning and afternoon for Jos. Following this pattern, I thought "Eden will sleep one hour in the morning and 3 in the afternoon" No. Try 1 hour in the morning and 1 hour or sometimes 45 minutes in the afternoon. I hope it's teething, although I see no physical signs of discomfort from her. She wakes up screaming and screaming. This to me means that she is: hungry, or poopie, in pain, or still tired. I have tried to solve 2 of those problems, we'll see how long it takes, I'll fight until 4:30. I haven't really broken her yet. Probably cuz I sleep so little anyway.

I just want 30 minutes. So I can sit the frick down. So I can eat lunch before 4 pm. Joel and I really need a date night. Having no family closer than an hour away makes it hard. All our friends have little kids too, I never feel right about dumping 2 more on them. I refuse to pay for babysitting. Maybe that's cheap, but unless I can pay with food, laundry facilities, or internet access, cash is too precious. It makes that $30 meal turn into $50 or $60.

Woe is me, woe is me. I'll stop now.

Posted by katiek at 4:10 PM

December 8, 2005

Why I love

Little Girls.

Sorry to those of you who do not have daughters, but this is what I have been dying to do the past few days because I hate (and I use this strongly) the hair ornaments for little girls with the ridiculous bows and elastic back---ugh.

I took wool felt, glued very quickly cut flowers on it then sewed them down and sewed ribbon to tie it on. Ohhhh, it makes me sooo happy! Felt and cuteness. Oh, yeah, I'm taking orders.

Little Boys.

Because you can dress them up like a box of Crayolas and no one questions their gender. Because they get to make cheesy smiles for Sunday School ornaments.

Posted by katiek at 2:03 PM

November 18, 2005

Persistance

After about an hour of little boy screaming I am frazzled. I happened to let it slip that we were going to church tonight and he would get to see Gary play the guitar (Gary is the lead guitarist in our worship team). I can't wait until Josiah gets the perception of time down. We've learned to wait until the last minute before telling him something fun will happen, but I just had a weak moment. In other weak moments, I have fell for the "Mama, I have to go pee-pee" and let him out of bed, taken him to the potty, where he continues to chat, sit, observe, squeeze not a drop of pee out, and get to stay awake another 10 minutes. I gave in once and have been paying for it ever since. It's hard because my little boy is preying on my desire to get him potty trained fully. So poor Josiah has been lying in his bed writhing in tantrum because he wants to see the guitars, not lie in bed. I finally tried to tell him that when his Papa gets home we'll see the guitars: "Is Papa home?" "No." "We'll go see the guitars when Papa gets home, when it's dark outside, OK!" I think I saw a little lightbulb go off. Then after a brief period I realized Josiah was not in his room. Mild mama panic. Then where do I find him, on the potty! Diaper off, pants down (But not off! yeah!) and he had actually gone pee. Wow, it's not over yet. Through the monitor I still here his running commentary. At least he's in his room.

Here's some nice pictures from Mr. Andy:


We didn't celebrate Halloween, we celebrated Isaac's first birthday! Eden was a butterfly and Josiah was a Rock Star! I wanted him to be more punk looking, but he ended up looking more like Elvis. Whatever, rock n' roll dude. Some more pictures might pop up in later entries, but check out more from the party here.

And this is for Holly, because she loves baby cheeks, Ike's are the best!

Posted by katiek at 3:42 PM

November 10, 2005

Humanity

You see it on teeny-bopper shows or maybe Warner Bros cartoons. Someone gets a glass of water thrown in the face to wake them up. You wonder if this really happens, well it happened to me this morning. Since Eden B. has been eating real food, I've been trying to get a couple good glasses of water in me every day so I don't dry up for her. Last night I put my glass of water on my nightstand thinking, "You know, I should move that to my dresser." This morning Eden and I dozed as Joel got in and out of the shower, and Josiah chirped around in his morning-person tones. All of a sudden I hear, "Here ya go Mama, Here ya go!" and whoosh! the remainder of my glass drenched my face, my shirt and my pillow. My first instinct would be to yell but (thank you Lord) instead I laughed and said, "Thank you Josiah." Changed my shirt, changed my pillowcase, put the glass on the dresser. Josiah said "Oh. All wet." I smerked, "Yeah Josiah, you got Mama all wet!" Eden continued to sleep peacefully under the comforter.

Later this morning I spent a little too much time on myself after my shower. I know this because something bad happens. Leave something alone long enough and bad things happen: mold, decay, overgrowth. Leave a toddler alone for long enough and well...you fill in the blank with a story of your own. I had praised Josiah for his potty use this morning before my shower. I have been trying to make sure he goes pee a few times before we leave in the mornings. He wanted to show me his 2nd or 3rd effort that morning so he carried his little potty up the stairs to my room to show me. Most of the contents of the potty had not made it up the stairs with him. Thankfully it was only pee. Never thought that would be something I was thankful for. I am thankful, once again, for my hardwood floors! I was actually amazed there was something left in the potty to show me and dump in the toilet. Blast that Once Upon a Potty book! "And Joshua came to show me his full potty" yeah, great,
most of the time.

Might I note that while spaghetti squash is healthier to use than spaghetti noodles it is risky to your digits to cut! I pray to Jesus every time I am trying to cut into those things that I will not be going to the ER because of dinner! We'll see, that butternut is one of the only veggies Josiah eats these days. I guess I trip to the ER for your sons overall health is worth it?

At Isaac Perkins first birthday Lynn truly outdid herself. I guess she's hit some super-woman pregnancy hormones. Listen to me talk. What am I doing these days? Everything. But she made pumpkin pancakes, pumpkin cupcakes, crafts to make, cider, and best of all: caramel apples! With Eden in my arms most of the time (Andy did get some girl snuggle time in though) I was not able to partake in the apple at the party but I took 2 home with me. The next day I decided to eat it but most of the caramel had slid off the apple, "I'll heat it up and mush the caramel back on" I thought. But I had stored the apple in an empty Starbucks cup and a Ziploc bag. I removed the apple and zapped the rest in the microwave. Bad scene. The cup and the bag melted. As I tried to salvage what was left some hot caramel dripped on my pinky finger as I went to throw the bag away. YEEEE-OUCH!!! This caramel burned the crap out of my pinky!!! I had my hand soaking in cold water the rest of the night! When I took my hand out of the cold water searing pain shot through all my fingers! I was praying to Jesus to heal my pinky that's how bad it hurt! I thought, "Crap I have to paint with this hand tomorrow! What will I do?" I was trying to envision the next day taking care of the kids with this overwhelming pain in my right hand. I'm such a wuss. By bedtime the pain was tolerable enough to slather aloe on it and wrap it in gauze. The next morning I had a pretty funky wave of a blister going down the length of my pinky. I did eat the apple though. And, Lynn, it was very good.

Posted by katiek at 5:21 PM

October 12, 2005

I'll cry if I want to

I am so looking forward to this weekend cuz it's kinda a cruel joke to have your birthday be on a wednesday. Actually Monday is probably worse. I'm 29 today, and that doesn't bother so much except my kids have been especially difficult today. I can't complain, they are ridiculously healthy, and they're cute. But man, Eden has her solid food constpation which ended before her nap thank God, but not without a glycerin suppository. Happy Birthday to me! Josiah is battling naps again the past couple days, and this is a week a need him to sleep.

The best birthday present (besides the sweet cards and emails) is the fact my late class tonight has been cancelled so I get to come home at 6:30 instead of 9:30. I have had to deal with too mant tantrums the past two days. And disciplining has been exhausting. I gave Josiah a much needed haircut today and the world practically collapsed as he screamed and writhed from fright from everthing from the squirt bottle to the clippers and the scissors. I finally gave him a lollipop and he settled down. I was praying the whole time that Jesus would calm him down, because I wasn't going to stop cutting or take him somewhere where he would scream in public for a hair stylist. Praise God, it ended before Sesame Street did. Josiah's bed fell apart as we got in it to read books before naptime and I lost it. On the ground sobbing with Josiah patting my back going "It's Ok Mama" and "Can I give a hug?" What a hilarious form of solice that is. It was repairable and I prayed to Jesus again to calm me down and give me just a little more strength to put it back together. Nobody was hurt, and I know now what happened. It's also yucky when your elderly in-law sends you an unnecessary letter to scold you for things that are none of his business. Joel justs lets it go. It makes me boil. I'm 29! I'm responsible! I don't need scolding! I want so much to unleash my wrath (again) but instead I bow to my husband's wisdom and eat it up.

So Happy Birthday to me! I will have a fun birthday celebration as I show my art work at Festival 34/84 this weekend with my best bud at my side to share giggles and secrets with. I'm not pregnant this year, so the open bar at the Festival's award reception will be enjoyed. Not too much *smile*. I have some real winners this year, I hope, with the Pods and some watercolor pod doodles ta boot.

I can't bring myself to sell the Brown Cows yet. They are too happy on my wall. I also don't have the funds to frame them the way I would like. I'll wait a little longer before I can't detach myself from all that hard work.

All these ventures are very expensive. I have a hard time spending the money. But I just remind myself that if I didn't I would not reap the joys and the rewards of letting go of the financial security blanket and just doing it. I really really believe that this is what God wants me to do. Now if I only had the faith to step it up even more and make spiritual steps with these opportunities. I can't feel guilty, guilt does not help.

I love my birthday. The weather is always perfect on my birthday. It's the time of year everyone is waiting for and people celebrate my birthday without knowing it by loving the weather that October 12th brings. I have much to be grateful for. Because I have a loverly family. I am healthy and strong. I am persuing one of my greatest joys with unleashed fervor. Thanks to all who will make this mama's birthday special.

Posted by katiek at 4:06 PM

October 10, 2005

The Greatest Idea Ever

My friend Jennie Worrell wanted a handmade present for her third baby, little Alyssa. So I racked my brain and I stole Lynn's idea. But I must say, this is one of the cutest and most professional things I've made! So again I give a great big "thanks!!" to Lynn for finding such a great project. I found butterflies on veer.com, photoshopped the body out and the veer logo. I ironed the wings on the back so your baby girl will look like they're flying!! I made 5 different ones. I put phrases on the front center that say things like "I'm all fluttery!" and "I can't walk, but I have wings!" and "watch me fly" and "little butterfly". They are just as pro looking as any carter's onesie. I was elated at how well they came out. Little Alyssa got the cool big winged green moth, a light blue butterfly, and a black, orange and white butterfly. So I have the monarch, and a yellow moth left. I will definately make more. But it ain't the cheapest overhead. I just think this is the bomb!

And for you pod lovers here's a 9x12 pod painting:

Posted by katiek at 9:27 AM

September 24, 2005

Hey Katie, It's yer Birfday

I'm going to be 29 in a few weeks, so here's my birthday list for all who love me, like me, or just want to send me a sweet surprise!
A Vacuum Cleaner or if you can't afford that, at least one of these.
Laundry Room Shelves
Chuck Taylor low tops in pepper red
ipod tuner, not an itrip, I've heard they are overrated.
Target little jacket, or money to get one
Photopaper
apron for painting
apron for cooking
Rubber stamp alphabet
Duvet cover from IKEA
Roll of canvas
highchair from IKEA
Double Jogging Stroller
400 speed film
Manual Can opener
Chandelier earrings
Ryan Adams: Cold Roses
ColdPlay XY
Starbucks giftcard
IKEA giftcard
itunes giftcard

This T-shirt
Or this one
Get my hair did
Massage

Thanks everybody (especially the fam)! I'm 29...on October 12.

Posted by katiek at 2:48 PM

September 19, 2005

New Kicks!

Fed Ex has been trying to drop something off at my house and I didn't know what it could be. I finally remembered to sign the door thing and leave it on the knob. It turns out it was my Canon! All fixed for free! Hoorah! So here's a picture of Josiah in his new fake Chuck Taylor's . BTW I want some real Chuck's for my birthday which is October 12th, I will be 29, not 30.

Posted by katiek at 1:22 PM

September 17, 2005

Can I Hoo Hi Hee?

We went to a little hiking trail next to the Kroger. Doesn't that sound strange. We went to our local Kroger. Parked the car and walked down a sidewalk and we were in Cheatham Hill/ Kolb Farm hiking, biking and horsing trail vacinity. It's a bit difficult to hike with a 2 1/2 year old. I've got Eden strapped to my front in the Bjorn and Joel battles with the stroller for a while and then ditches it into the bushes. He grabs Josiah up in his arms and carries him for a bit then lets him walk for a bit. Convincing him with Let's Run! Let's Exercize!!. But the bestest mostest fun for both father and son is to find a stick and wack at trees. Joel adding his kung-fu sounds Hi yah! Hoo Hah! This became one of the funner things for Josiah while hiking. That and trying to catch up to me and saying, Wait Mama, Come back Come back!

It was envirgorating to walk through the poison ivy forest and hear an actual bird. At one point the traffic could not be heard. I felt like I was in detox, I hadn't had my coffee and haven't had it yet. ugh, the headache.

On the way back to the car Josiah caught up to me and was holding my hand I want a stick he declared. We stopped and found one that wasn't under a bunch of poison ivy. He carried it proudly and when I asked him to walk he said Can I Hoo Hi Hee? Joel and I started laughing pretty hard.

Thanks to all in blogland for your thoughts and prayers. We are definately in a stressful time. But I practiced some spheres today and I feel good when I actually get up and do my homework. I have the go ahead from my prof to do a cow painting. I hope it works. I've got 2 weeks to practice that. And Joel and I have been able to talk more, God had given us rest with the kids taking coordinating naps (yes!) It's always crazy when you don't have the down time to talk and come together and when you do you're both feeling the same. Praise God for my husband. Keep up your prayers and pray that Joel will not feel discouraged, guilty, or burned out. He has always been a great leader, and he needs to a good Giddiup! in the direction God wants him to go.

My Art History class is like nothing I've ever taken. It's Post WW2 art. I know about it, have very very briefly studied some, but now I will really be studying it. I have some reading to do this weekend. Some is generic, but some is from my two books After Modern Art by Hopkins (crazy cover, I hate looking at it, I might cover it up!) and the Rise of the 60's by Crow. We watched a movie last class called Night and Fog. It's from 1956 and it's about the concentration camps. The emotion is pretty fresh in the film, and it's in French so it is closer to home. It's narrated very poetically, and let me tell you, it was disgusting. I've seen a lot of films with footage of camp victims, but this tops them. The blankets made of human hair, the paper made of skin. The bulldozer pushing bodies into mass graves. It's aweful, aweful. I was hiding my eyes at the end, about to cry. I looked around at the calloused college students wondering if they were just as effected. Unfortunately the 2 girls I know from that class skipped that day, and when they showed up at Watercolor class, I told them that they missed a traumatic film. Whew! But I know my prof wanted us to understand why artists in the 1950's were reacting the way they did after the war. Especially the European artists. Some fascinating art was produced and some completely insensitive. I mean, Nazi and Jew Legos? That's gross.

Posted by katiek at 5:59 PM

August 25, 2005

You Thought It Wasn't Possible

But it's true. Josiah now has Underoos with guitars on them. Thank you Lynn. She's full of ideas folks. Lynn created these with iron on printer paper and a huge heart of a kindergarten teacher/supermom. Many funny giggles back at you! I'm sure there will more pictures of happy boy adventures to follow. The simple pleasures of mommie-hood. Hehehe.

Posted by katiek at 9:31 PM

August 24, 2005

No waste Wendesday

For my son, Josiah who is learning to use the potty and surprises me everyday. So no errands today, just library fun for Josiah!

Posted by katiek at 10:26 AM

August 21, 2005

Tea and Bliss

When my mom was here helping out with Eden she left a few bags of her favorite tea here. It's Constant Comment. Yumminess! And with a bit of honey, it's even better. I bought a whole box this week which is kinda silly because I have so many boxes of tea. If you want a hot cuppa tea come to my house!

I have taken a break on the potty training front. I thought that until Eden was a little bit easier to entertain without my absolute physical attention, I would wait and just communicate with Josiah and talk to him about it. He has begun yanking his diaper off when it's too wet for him. In fact one morning I found him in his room with no diaper on, and no dirty one to be found! I asked him, "Josiah, where's you diaper?" He pointed to our Diaper Champ and said, "Garbage Can Mama!" I would like to kiss whoever made the Diaper Champ, because it's easy enough for the child wearing the diaper to throw it away himself! Yesterday Josiah went potty 3 times all by himself!! He did pee on the floor an aweful lot (Praise God for hardwood floors). Twice today he decided he had to go #2 and he did it all by himself! Yesterday he came to celebrate his achievement and I was on the phone with Joel. I looked in the potty and there was nothing in it, I was kinda disappointed. I said, "Josiah there's nothing there" He then showed me that he had already emptied it into the toilet and wanted to flush. I celebrated with great fervor!! God has answered my prayer. I was getting so tired, so sad, I had no idea what I was going to do. I had nightmares of my boy being 5 years old and not being potty trained. It's coming along, and Josiah's showing me how.

Posted by katiek at 7:24 PM

August 3, 2005

Marathon Moms

If it weren't for postpartum body fat I would be fainting on my couch right about now. I have spent the better part of the lunch time hours getting Josiah on his potty. And it worked! Two #2's! Hoorah! I have the charts, the stickers, the communication and the cheerleader pose ready for my boy when it does it, anywhere outside of the diaper. I must admit, it was difficult to realize that this was not going to happen on it's own, and my boy is getting waaaay to big for dipes. Thanks to a fellow ATLblogger for a link to a video I'm sure my son (and my dad and bro) would enjoy, this will be relief after watching Bob the Builder a gazillion times. It's 3pm and I'm finally getting to eat lunch.

Now I digress: Has anyone else heard those HP commercials where the lady is asking her grocer if he has oranges in any other color like cadmium orange or burnt sienna? Or the guy getting post it notes and comments that they are more burnt umber than yellow? I dunno this painting mama who has lots of drive time these days thought it was funny.

Another Marathon Mom got Eden some pretty presents whilst in Chinatown. Cute stuff! Thanks Lynn!

A bib with cute Chinese girls on it, a cute pair of pink shoes (Eden wears them everyday whether they match or not) and some strange snack that tastes....interesting, but the big yellow faces are to smile for!

The shoes are cuter on.

Here's my latest nude in progress. Some folks from church gave me the "giggles and raised eyebrows" for my nudes this past Sunday when they looked through my portfolio. Oh well, that's why I'm where I am. The church needs to learn, and get free, and the arts need to be redeemed. We're all sinners.

It's a bit Picasso right now, the shoulder and breast are off a bit, not in a good way. I skewed them down and messed them up. But I like the primitiveness of the face and hands.

Posted by katiek at 3:39 PM

July 22, 2005

Creativity at it's finest!

Some may think that since I'm an artist I would have super creative ideas for my kids all the time, but not so. My son is obsessed with guitars and my mom and my brother have supplied us with many music catalogues to keep his interest and he can destroy them and I haven't spent a dime! It's hard to find books about instruments for 2 yr olds! If you know of one let me know! Jeanette did send us a book with ukeleles on almost every page and that's pretty good!

Eureka! I came up with the best idea for our long car trip to the beach. I took Josiah's ratty catalogue pages and made this!

Here are the pages:

And here are some pictures from Veer that Josiah and I like alot:
And here's theback ,after all we can't be prejudice:

I secured the sheet protectors with tape at the top to maybe keep him from yanking the pictures out right away, but if he does no great loss. I guess this is part of my craftiness to keep from buying tons of toys not directly associated with my son's obvious interest. So I hope this makes Joel's drive more pleasent because after all, he'll be in the other car with Jos. I'll get the little girl who'll be screaming on and off I'm sure.

And I must mention these crafty ideas:
The Fugitive Pigments
Kitchen Magician if you need to spruce up that booooring grilled cheese

Posted by katiek at 7:27 PM

June 22, 2005

Eden

For all the frilly dresses she has in her closet I love my girl best in her t-shirt and blanket. I got out my Pentax K1000 today to have an Eden photo shoot. I took 15 pictures right away. The first round she was hungry and she peed all over herself. Difficult model. I miss film, and I finally finished a roll this past weekend. I will go to Wolf verily, verily. OK she's crying now.

Posted by katiek at 5:09 PM

June 14, 2005

*Toddler Storm

I'm really glad to have finished Vessel, and I am excited to move onto my next nude. I have to keep my paints where I will actually work and my painting where I can see it and make mental notes. So, we have an accident now and then involving Josiah's disobedience. This was a doozee!

My mucked up pallette

The first 4 inches of my new clean canvas

I was probably the most mad at the fact that he ruined his "Beetle-Mania" T-shirt with yellow paint, and his blue shorts too. His hands were covered, so were his feet and shins. It took everything in me to not say mean things, but instead I reminded Josiah that what he did was very bad and he knew it already.

See, it really is sorta my mistake cuz I let him contribute (with me watching) to the Vessel painting. Here are Josiah's little marks:

But my apprentice stepped over his boundries and he felt it...on his bum.
I think he's over it.

Posted by katiek at 3:40 PM

March 10, 2005

Boyant

After a fun-filled day with Josiah and Spencer Monday I was feeling quite achey on Tuesday. In fact, down right decrepit.
This should be an advertisment against having three children back to back to back. I don't have back problems, I'm not terribly out of shape and I take care of myself. Pregnancy is not supposed to be a walk in the park. About 4pm or so on Tuesday I started having contractions. Not the scary kind, the annoying kind. The kind you get and think your skin just shrunk and can't take the size of your baby. I had no idea I was having contractions when I was pregnant with Josiah until my midwife told me, "See, you're having a contraction!" OK, this was well before my due date. Duh, Braxton-Hicks. But this was all evening long. It got really uncomfortable!! I couldn't enjoy sitting, walking, or even being around noise of any kind. I told Joel I was going to have to take it easy. He did bedtime for Jos and I went to the bathtub. It was only 9pm and I wasn't sleepy just getting an abdominal workout! I took the books with me and stayed in the bathtub soaking in vanilla goodness with candles until 10:45pm. I've heard from several moms who've had Braxton-Hicks earlier that it's nothing but annoying. But I read about it anyway. I started thinking about labor and what we'll do with Josiah. I started wondering how big I will get and how big Eden will be. But lying in a vanilla goodness bathtub makes everything easier to think about. No crime drama can take me away like that. Last night wasn't as bad, although I do think I'll be having them every evening on and off, just please not all the time. Eden, you have to come no earlier than May. Mama's gotta finish her Art Class!

And in more uplifting news, Jon and Kate Maurer finally had their baby!!
They were waiting until birth to find out what it was. And waiting is the key word. Kate's "due date" was February 19th!! But she had waited a while for prenatal care since they were moving. Hey I understand, I as in Norway with Jos, there wasn't much I could do either. So she had a serious guestimate as her due date. The crazy thing is, without any consultation/communication we both chose Eden as the name for a girl. We came to an agreement that that would be OK. Their son Judah sat in the hospital for 2 days waiting for a name because poor Jon and Kate had a similar dilema with his name. Judah is a great name, I wouldn't have named him anything else. The Maurer's had a boy *phew* his name is Creed. Congratulations Jon and Kate!! I can't wait to hear the whole story, it sounds like he came quick, almost in the car!!

Some other happy bits:
1. The Perkins are giving Joel and I a date night! Yeah! I'm going out to dinner with my husband and we will stroll and hopefully see some art!
2. I got to talk to my dad for a whole hour yesterday! This is rare, but seeing as we are both on spring break and he is also off from the church, he had time to call and ask me some html questions. Like I'm the guru.
3. I scrubbed my screen porch floor. This means I can go out and get some paint and make the floor pretty. Find the hammocks, set up futon #2, and fix the screens. Maybe put up a Jap latern or two!!
4. This lovely blog/site made me happy.
5. I finally got the HOPE grant for my class! I got a phat check for $650 bucks yesterday!
6. I hopefully will grab a free futon matress from a fellow-freecycler! That'll go in the screened porch.

Posted by katiek at 4:16 PM

February 21, 2005

Investing

I know this sounds a little Dr. Phil, but I finally came to peace this weekend about my currant state. I realize that it is not laziness to be thinking of nothing but my house, home and family right now. Amid all the reading you do when your gestating, you realize that this is the most interesting, important thing going on in your life right now! I used to pride myself on the fact that I could work on stuff while pregnant and God bless those women that can. But I truly think (and I read it too) that the chemicals in your brain while pregnant make you want to think only of that. Call it Nesting, whatever.

So as I listened in church to Ryan talk about living for the temporary and investing in those things unseen I realized that I was kicking and kicking myself for becoming what I did not want to be--100% Mommie. This is what I want to be though, isn't that sick? It's the culture behind being a mommie I don't like. God designed the relationship to be beautiful, a time to cherish, a time to invest. It's a time that is not about you at all, even though it enriches your life entirely. It's sacrificial in so so many ways. And my boy is only 2. What happens when you sacrifice at age 12, age 18, age 25. It's just as hard, and just as enriching. Investing in a person, forming what they will think and how they will see the world! That's an important job! That's why I weep when I see/hear about parents who neglect their children's little pysche or are manipulating their child into relationship with them. They are abusing a gift that God gave them to learn what it is to be selfless, and to remember how new and beautiful the world is though the eyes of a child. I have to step out of this materialistic world of "mommies" and believe that what my children take in will be screened by the wisdom God gives me.

It's so hard not to go too far. No TV, no sugar, no fast food, no artificial flavors or colors, no obnoxious toys, no commercialism, no ridiculous hip little clothes, play outside, keep everything clean, discipline in a mild controlled 'cool' way, and look perfect while obeying all these rules!! God gave me these children, and I am truly thankful. God gave me good parents, and I am truly thankful. God gave me an awesome husband/papa for my kids, for that I am exceedingly grateful. Those things show an investment in the future, in the Kingdom of God. May my investment go and take steps I never will take. I pray for Josiah every night, "God bless Josiah, make him a great man of faith, may he do things for the Kingdom no one else can do."

Posted by katiek at 3:26 PM

February 14, 2005

Happy V-Day!

Josiah made some Valentine's last week for some of you lucky folks. He loves coloring his hands more than the paper! Spread the washable marker LOVE!

Posted by katiek at 2:51 PM

February 10, 2005

Some fun bits

Is this only in my house where the milk that the toddler doesn't drink is used in my tea after he's sleepin'?

The Dismembering of Mr. Potato Head

Visiting an old friend at the baby store...

Posted by katiek at 2:52 PM

February 4, 2005

Belated Birthday

Yesterday was Josiah's second birthday. We'll be celebrating it on Saturday with a sweet group of our friends. This birthday has been a bit harder because Josiah has been getting over a stomach bug, and I've been getting over taking care of a sick kid. Whew! It is not easy! It's not like I'm worried about him, but it's a constant weight that one moment you'll regret giving him too much juice cuz you're cleaning it up 2 hours later. But I'm actually very very thankful because over the course of 6 days he's only thrown up 7 times. That's pretty easy to maintain.

But anyway, I sang "Happy Birthday" to my boy as I lifted him out of bed and he was happy. And healthy. We went to Toys R Us with the mission of getting his birthday present. No luck. What a trap for parents!! All the toys are 200% maxed out, battery powered, plastic, Elmo, Disney, Barney, Wiggles nonsense!! So I gave up very quickly thinking that if there was something that really struck his fancy I'd consider it.
But nothing. He liked the $40 Leapfrog books and the $179 big kid guitar and you know that's waaaay out of the price range. But we wandered around. I let him enjoy every section: the book section, the car section, the Elmo section, the big kid music section w/ karaoke machine.

I'd like to say I'm sentimental about his arrival into the world. Thinking about those first days and smiling. I did look through his baby book with him (he really likes it) and I think Joel was "Awww"-ing more than me. I'm thinking of another labor, another entrance, another first days. I'm thinking of how I haven't even started a baby book for my daughter! But I love love love my boy! My big 2-year-old boy! I wouldn't rewind for anything. He talks with me, gives me kisses, plays, sings, sleeps all night! I do miss the baby fat, the little he did have.
Speaking of fat, I'm feeling it man. I tried on a dress that I wore my first trimester and I look like a cartoon character. All lop-sided and lumpy. I thought, "oh this dress will be so great in the spring!" Then I washed it wrong, now it's no longer maternity. It'll be a long while before I can wear it. Cuz you know you can't breastfeed in a dress.

Here are the apple cake cupcakes waiting for "the Invited" on Saturday!They made the house smell awesome!

Posted by katiek at 3:14 PM

January 31, 2005

Reflection 1

Here's a reflection of what my worries encompassed when Josiah was new. He's a skinny boy. A little monkey. Long and lean. Babies aren't supposed to be like that, right? Well, I beg to differ. Our babies will never be fat. But I must admit when I see photos like this one where he's so so skinny, it makes me sad. There was nothing, nothing I could do. God gave me a healthy son who happened to be in the 5th percentile on weight for the first 6 months of his life (except for the moment he was born).
The doc's never told me to change what I was doing. But I cried, alot. When Josiah throws up I can't help but remember the fear. What goes in must stay in. Don't get skinnier little boy. He's been sick to his stomach and I've watched as my baby becomes a child and reacts to his stummy feeling bad with groans, snuggles and comments. Instead of spontaneous barfing he makes a grimace, reaches for me to hold him. We snuggle for a while. He licks his lips, and you see his tongue rolling around in his mouth. He's gonna yak. Tonight he yakked in the tub, a bit of a blessing. But I'm so used to having a boy with long monkey legs and arms and a belly to round him off. No belly for the past couple days. He lives off juice and crackers and applesauce. So that pain sneaks in again of having an underweight child. I really have to thank God for such gracious friends and even strangers during that period. I never got terrible comments.
And he was healthy! Praise God! He did all the things babies do and I lived with the fact his arms and legs were swimming in his onesies. He wore onesies until he was one because his pants wouldn't stay up without the friction, he had no waist. And still really doesn't.

So I pray tonight that Josiah will be healed. Not that I'm worried he'll starve, but because I'm tired of being sick and dealing with sickness. I want his birthday to be a true celebration of health, joy, life and the future. And I am truly thankful that my son is now nothing to be concerned about. When he barfs I clean it up and in an half hour hand him his juice, "You'll be alright," I say to him and to myself.

Posted by katiek at 9:27 PM

December 16, 2004

Dooties III

Maybe this is just something I heard from mom to mom but is there such thing as an "anal" stage for toddlers? I know there is an "oral" stage where everything must be experienced in the mouth, but the "anal" stage seems to be right before potty-training when the kid is realizing their discomfort and also that they can pull their diaper off. This is really annoying for me right now. Josiah isn't creeping me out or anything, ask me again around puberty, but it's down right annoying!! If you've read the prequels to this post (Dooties I and II) you know what this post is about. Josiah ripped off his diaper in the middle of his nap yesterday. I have figured out that if I put him down for his nap and he doesn't go to sleep for the first hour he's probably messed his pants. Yesterday was one of those days. You can smell it in the air as soon as you open the door. Yesterday though I had that odd sense that something was worse, cuz I could smell it outside of his bedroom door. He didn't take his diaper off folks, no! He reached inside his diaper, pulled out the contents and wiped it where ever he saw fit. When I went to change the poop monster there was nothing but a "skidmark" inside his pants!! I was ticked! How did he manage to poo more outside his diaper than in it without taking the diaper off!? And note to readers who are saying "well, that's what you get for using cloth diapers" No! This was with a sposie-Huggies to be exact. My son is clever. I find myself saying to him several times a day, "Jos, get your hands out of your pants" and he obeys. Again, ask me again at puberty.

I am quite impressed with my mommy expertise and speed. I was able to:
1. plop Josiah in the tub (after removing all the bath toys) scrub him down
2. remove all crib items
3. dry off kid and rediaper him
4. spray down crib mattress and bars (not much on the bars thankfully)
5. put new crib sheets on with new blanket and kitty and book
6. reclothe kid checking first for any missed poo in fingernails, face, ears, hair
7. plop him into bed with a soft, "go to sleep little boy"
in less than 30 minutes. Full nap was not acquired yesterday but at least and hour and a half was! Ask me again in May if I feel so cool. Like I've said before, just when you've got it figured out, the kid decides to grow up and you have to grow with them.

I told myself that I wasn't going to try potty-training until after little girl comes, because their isn't enough time for potty completion before little girl comes. But this is gross.

I love my little boy, and sometimes I think, "Am I going to love Little Girl as much as I have Josiah?" I know the answer already. My whole world revolves around Josiah and when Little Girl comes I'll have two orbits.

Some tid bits:
--Andy Montgomery has a pic of the old YMCA on his blog today for all you old New-City-ites
--My grandma is getting a new knee today. If you think of my parents (who are my grandfolks caretakers) pray that my mom will have supernatural stamina and my dad will say "NO" to any superfluous work and not have any migranes so he can be available.
--My sister-in-law Amy is flying to Manilla for Christmas. Tsunami for Christmas anyone?

Posted by katiek at 4:02 PM

December 2, 2004

Photo Album

This is my little family. But hey, I'm working on making it bigger! Lovely photo shoot over thanksgiving. thanks to Cat for snapping for us. I also am looking forward to "the Three of Us" pictures on my next roll. My dad and my brother were seranading Josiah with the guitar so he would look at the camera; we tried to keep from laughing.

I thought I would be watching the Worrell kids for a lot more time than I have. Turns out Jennie stayed home from work on Monday, so no kiddies for me. Wednesday, Carrie F brought Kaitlyn over about 1:30, I thought she might be there as early as 9am. It was fun, although Kaitlyn finally had a meltdown when I wouldn't let her have a 2nd banana. She was with us until 8:30 (whew!). Tommorrow I'll have her again, and only until 5:30. I tried to get her to take a nap--nope. We spent tthe afternoon swinging and throwing balls around the cold crunchy yard. She wanted to visit the Chucky Cheese next door but I said no, those toys aren't ours. I didn't think my neighbor was even home to ask.

But dang it was cold yesterday!! I took Jos to a playground for a whopping 20 minutes and about froze! It's not that I can't handle 50 degrees, but the playground was moist from previous rain and the sun wasn't shineing the way I would have liked. Burrrrr! Kaitlyn's presence made up for that. The highlight was them chasing each other around the coffee table. Kaitlyn, who is 2 1/2 is quite good at running, jumping, chasing, hiding and hugging. Josiah runs like a rag doll with legs, flopping his long arms in the air like that will gain him speed. He really didn't understand Kaitlyn's hugs. I had to show him what it was. It was a blast playing with a little girl. I think I'd like one!

I have alot on my plate given to me by my Drill Sargent:
1. Paid off student loan with lower interest loan (Haha No more Covenant Monkey on my back!)
2. Paid off car? Maybe? Never quite sure how much it was.
3. Got accepted to KSU. Whoo Hoo Mama's back in College! Hello BFA!
4. Fill out FAFSA
5. Work at Christmas "Dinky" Shoppe
6. Website (she says sheepishly)
7. Portrait for Carrie F
8. Get my head out of you know where and start to work again. I gotta use my new found matabolism and energy for artsy things!

Here's a funny thought: I went to the Cobb County Health Dept to pick up this months free food (aka WIC) and I was told what the jibberish on my card meant. I am required to go to a breastfeeding class! What the fart is that about! I have one healthy boy that was breastfed exclusively for 4 months and with food until he was 15months! You think I would know how! Maybe they knew how skinny Josiah was and thought I needed a refresher course.

Anyway, I have loads of thoughts rolling around in my noggin that I'd love to write down but I gotts to fill out this waaay long FAFSA form. It would be great if we were poor enough for it. Funny. There's always the HOPE. Georgia rulz.

Posted by katiek at 3:55 PM

November 1, 2004

babies

What an exciting weekend of baby-ness! This post will be brief because my computer is being tempramental and I'm tired, very tired. Isaac Perkins was born on Saturday/Sunday and we went to visit him last night. It was quite an exciting birth story. I told Lynn it would be less than 12 hours, if anyone else wants their labor shortened I'll declare it for you!

I had an ultrasound today of our Little Bun #2. I got a video as well since Joel didn't come with. Very amazing to see the little one wigglin' around. Sometimes I think I feel 'em kicking and I'm probably right. They say #2 you can tell earlier. I haven't worried about this one hardly at all, but when that ultrasound started going I had a start. They aren't flattering, seeing little Isaac helps me remember this little one isn't a skeleton/tadpole swimming around, it's a little person.

I'm feeling good, the baby looks good. I'm 13 weeks 5 days. Officially my 4th month and so I broke out all my maternity clothes and started wearing them. I have no pride except the fact I'm a mama, and when will I get to wear these clothes except for periods of about 7 months throughout my life?

I'll post trick-or-treating pics soon, had no time to develop the latest batch today. Josiah made a cute Peter Pan thanks to the costume from the other side of the world.

Posted by katiek at 3:37 PM

October 8, 2004

At the end of the week there's Art.

I have yet another art reception to go to tonight, this one is a bit more low key. I'll know what to expect. No goat cheese and red wine at this one. In fact I'm having to bring chips, it's a bit disgraceful I know. I don't think I'll win prizes at this one either and to top it off, the people are snobbier at this show than at the one last week. It's a shame because they're giving away less money--way less. The top prize last week was $1000, this week $200. Whatever, I'm happy to be able to show my work and rub elbows even if they're snobby ones. And we'll be outta there in time to watch debates.

I interviewed another midwife group this week. What a frustrating task! With Josiah I was lucky to just get in the door let alone interview! All "the books" tell you to interview and make lists and ask questions. Well you know what, it's futile. The medical profession frustrates me. I'm always treated like a bit of an idiot. Do I look like one? Last time I checked I looked sane. Well, I have been driving with the windows down, we know what that does to your already fuzzy hair. Anyway, this group had a few attractive things. Nicer office than the last group (it felt less like the health dept), and it had less midwives in the practice so I would see them all before I give birth. But man, the interview was discouraging. The midwife I saw was the senior midwife and she was sure chatty.
She told me a few things that I hated:
1. "Since your last baby was so large we would do a couple glucose tests to make sure you aren't diabetic."
2. "We would never let you go to 42 weeks since your last baby was so large."
3. "With your history, we would not attempt the vacuum before deciding on a C-section because your last baby was really too big to vacuum out anyway. I mean, if he's not coming out, he's not coming out."

I asked what their epidural rate was and she said it was high. She scoulded me for not getting a pap before now. She asked me if this pregnancy was with the same father (oh that ticks me off!!!). And basically had no respect for any of my questions. I tell ya what, it makes me want to spit. I still have to decide though.
Help me decide! Take my survey!
I hope it works. I did learn that I was 9 weeks and not seven. I still fit into most of my clothes. Somedays I don't feel pregnant at all and others--ugh.

Jadon's birthday party is tommorow: Happy Birthday Big Boy!!

Posted by katiek at 3:42 PM

September 10, 2004

The Longest Week Ever

Joel agreed with me that this week was the longest one ever. I have struggled to find things to do. Especially since two days a week I have no hubby to entertain the boy in the evenings. They sorely miss each other. Joel has been feeling a bit emotional about not being able to spend "papa time" with Josiah like he would like to. Hurricane Frances made most of this week gloomy and aweful and no fun free outdoor activites. Yesterday Jos and I soaked up the sun with a very long outing all over town. We went to Laurel park and met other kiddies. We went to Silver Comet (where I only had the energy to stroller Josiah along). Josiah loved seeing all the bikes whizzz past him, "Bike! Bike! Bikers! Bike!" and mama says, "Yes honey, that's a bike, yeah that's another one. Your right he's wearing a hat..." I collapsed at 9 and gabbed with my mom about Christmas.

My parents saga continues. They are taking care of their elders way beyond what normal human beings could do. And they have finally made they decision to put my grandfather on a waiting list for a nursing home. This is a big deal since his wife is fine and will probably out live us all. She will get her knee replaced this Dec. Ten days before Christmas.
My brother and his new wife will go to London to be with her parents. I want them to take me with them. Christmas here is, for the first time, going to be all my effort. I will be the hostess. I will cook and bake. I will have the tree and the decorations. I will have the fireplace (with fatty candals if not a roaring fire). This is a bit overwhelming. And I was sad at first that there would be no celebration at my folks house. But it hasn't been it's best having to dodge wheelchairs, pill boxes, carts, kleenex boxes and that overall sterile feeling of a home/medical facility. My parents have done soooo much. It's time for them to be at our house for a day and a half for some unabashed Holiday Cheer! I am 28 for goodness sake!

Oh! I would like to point out to you Mom's and lovers of children's books my sidebar waaaay at the bottom called "Library finds". I post a list every few weeks (when I have to return the old books) and I also get about 3 kids Cd's. I've found winners like Woody Gutherie Kids Songs and the latest: Dan Zane. His CD Family Dance is packaged in a board book with wonderful drawings. One of Josiah's latest crazes is guitars. "Why isn't my Unca Kirk here to teach me and play with me!!" cries the little boy. Just kidding. But he does stare at this book that has animals playing banjos, guitars, electric guitars, mandelins, and yukes and says, "tar, taaaar, tar" over and over. This CD features Rosanne Cash on one song and has Sandra Bernhart dialogueing with Dan about Thrift Stores. Of course that one me over right away. Not Sandra, Thrift Stores. Also Dan has been on Sesame Street singing his song "Jump Up". So Cute. Simple joys for a lovely autumn day!

I am working on art, I promise. I am working on yet another present for friends. We will see what it comes out looking like. cheers!

Posted by katiek at 3:37 PM

September 2, 2004

Graduate School Widow, Full time Babysitter

I really love my son Josiah. I have alot of fun with him. This morning I was bemoaning having to figure out how the heck I was going to entertain him all day and all evening (see Joel usually comes home to entertain the latter part of the day). Yesterday Josiah was acting particularly sick and I didn't have the heart to drag him around to all the places I needed to go (I need an umbrella stroller bad, folks). So we went to Blockbuster. I know this is something horrid. I don't want my kids to know about Disney but I'll tell ya what. When I rented Monsters Inc. I laughed. And when I didn't have a Baby Einstein to show my 5 month old I put on Monsters Inc. for him. He stared at the screen like it was the holy land. If I can get a screaming free shower, I was doin' it! I just remember when I was sick my mom would let us watch more TV than we ever were allowed to. Grant it this was before we had much movie watching capabilities so I mostly watched PBS. But I thought if I can watch it with him (I always will want to do that). I can't be a parent that shelters that much.

I got Emperor's New Groove because I heard it was cute. And it was OK. Not as good as Nemo or Monsters though. I just can't stand David Spade. But the music was fun. And the guy who plays Puddy does one of the voices. With the weather all gloomy we had to stay in, and Josiah sat on the couch with me and snuggled and watched the movie. We shared the same bowl of lentils and crackers and cheese. Munch munch, splatter, couch. When I say watched I mean maybe he looked at the screen for a total of 5 minutes and then took off. But my son is snuggly. I can't understand why both Joel and I don't come from physical snuggly families. But Josiah likes to sit on the couch with me and lean against me. He likes to crawl into my lap when I read. And if he's not entirely on top of me he will stand next to me when I read and stand on my foot, never fails, and it hurts. 30 lbs on my foot!

I felt like a crappy mom for staying in and watching movies with Jos. But when we had good snuggle and shared dinner I just thought -this is how my son and I will relate. When Papa joel is around they throw balls and run around and scream. When Mama Kate is the one to babysit we read, we snuggle we eat fun things and listen to music.

I am so so thankful to God for how children grow. I don't know what I would do with a 5 year old. And I don't have to know, not yet. I don't get up three times a night to nurse anymore. My son talks to me and tells me what he wants. Reasoning happens about as much as scoulding. He's creative and runs around. He recognizes so much and that makes me happy cuz I didn't do much at all. I'm just here all the time for him. It's a great place to be.

Posted by katiek at 10:13 PM

August 20, 2004

The boy with the colors of the world in his mouth.

My mom gave Josiah a box of washable markers during there visit earlier this week. I have been letting him have fun with them. This means that his hands, his tummy, his diaper, his face and his mouth were very brightly colored after about 20 minutes in his Color Seat. He was getting a bit crazy so I snatched him up and plopped him in the tub. The tub water turned a cool swimming pool color. His hands are pretty well dyed, it might take a while for that to come off. But his face cleaned off pretty well. He only colored it with orange, not blue. His tummy looked a bit like the Hulk.

This is for Gypsy: The I cleaned my Bathroom today Castle:

Does anyone have a suggestion for a free web photo album?

Posted by katiek at 3:12 PM

August 6, 2004

Happy Things

After Josiah's doctor's appt I told Joel the questions they asked me about Josiah's development. The first thing they asked was, "Does he play with other children?" another question was, "Does he play with crayons" and the kicker was, "Does he say 6 words you can understand?" Why yes, Josiah does say 6 words we can understand. In fact yesterday Joel wrote down all the words Josiah says that we understand. We counted over 60. And yes, Josiah enjoys crayons. Today he decided to say "Color!" nice and plain. I've been trying to get used to riding Joel's bike with the baby seat on the back. For one thing, ya think it'll be a sweey leisurely ride but the thing is Josiah weighs almost 30 lbs. That means that I'm not only pedaling my body weight, but also the 20lb bike and the thirty pound baby. That's 180lbs!! whew! So yesterday I set it all up, I thought "Cool, maybe I can ride all the way tot he thrift store!" But after a few mishaps, I turned around and at my front door I was overcome with nausea, the kind ya get when you've jogged too long. It kinda ruined yesterday's bike experience. Today I was a bit more realistic, three times around the circle. Hopefully I'll have strong legs enough to make it too the thrift store.

Lola Nancy has my car, she's driving to see Nathan in Gainsville FL. So I've been kinda stuck. I went to swim with Jenny and Jadon on Wednesday other than that I've been here. Recooping from last week's vacation. I continue to work on jewelry prototypes. Got some inspiration from Superhero. I'd love a website like that! Here's my pro picture of my Word necklace, and like Superhero I need to come up with a trendy cool name for this necklace. Suggestions?

Posted by katiek at 7:44 PM

August 3, 2004

The Artist

I'm so proud. My son loves to paint. And today at the doctor he weighed in at 27lbs 13oz and 34 1/4 in tall. That's 90% on height and 80% in weight. We have arrived at what we were when we started.

Posted by katiek at 7:42 PM

July 14, 2004

Photos

There is something about getting a new package of photos that makes me so happy. It's just not the same as digital. The waiting is grand, and the feeling of the prints in your hands, shuffling through them again and again is rewarding. I've updated Little Boy May and now have June and July up. Check them out! And I promise my son does wear clothes, just not in the majority of these pictures!

This one is the winner I think, although the ones with Kaitlyn are a close second. It wins because of the sentimentality.

Katie and Francesca (she was 16 months, that mean I was a little over 2 yrs):

Yeah! I found a photographer in Marietta Square that will take slides for me and it won't break the bank! I have also made headway on my Father/Son painting. I'll post some progress shots.

Joel and I have rented the second two Matrix movies (which we have seen already) and I got to tell ya', I feel all pumped up after seeing them! War and guns and kung-fu!! What makes it even better is the full 2nd disc of special features! I love those making of things!

Posted by katiek at 7:28 PM

June 9, 2004

I'm Tired

I love my little boy. He's joyful, he's well behaved, he's cute. And after hearing how Amelia J is doing I'm very thankful that he sleeps very very well. I know understand why people only have one kid. It's not the chilbirth, not the late night feedings, it's the "Play with me! I want all your attention!" that wears me OUT! I'm a caretaker, I suck at being a playmate.

Yesterday I realized that after winding down to one nap he now doesn't want to take it at 11am anymore. In fact I don't know when he wants to take it. NEVER! So yesterday I put him in his bed at 11:30 and endured a screaming session for 15 mintues. I felt horrible, selfish, mean!! So today I made up my mind to do everything in reverse. I would run errands at 10am not 2pm and after the errands we would eat lunch and Jos would have his nap. Great in theory. I entertained him until 1:30 and then decided I was ready to be selfish and mean again. I endured 10 minutes of screaming. Why is it that all the books tell you what kids need but your kid never wants those things! How do the experts know? I wonder if these people, the experts should just write a book about their own kid and tell everybody else that. "this is my kid, good luck with yours!"

We've decided to start to attend Northgate Church. We went on Sunday and loved it. Small, lots of young famililes and very laid back. We can see potential to get plugged in quickly and not be one of the masses. They also spoke about financial freedom through God's power. I can dig that. We've gone to 8 churches in the past 3 months, we're glad to feel more settled.

I've been painting my kitchen cabinets:
Thinking about the next project, and getting inspired by a talk with cat about what our friend Jen has been creating I put canvas around the block extras of our hardwood floors. It's a bit Art-o-Mat too.

Posted by katiek at 9:41 AM

June 1, 2004

Vague

I know this photo is a bit vague, but it's a post haircut picture and I feel like it's a pretty picture. Josiah is rarely this still.

Posted by katiek at 9:36 AM

May 27, 2004

New Photos

I've added pictures to the Little Boy May photo album. I think this is my favorite. Nice composition.
The few pic's I took from our St. Augustine trip were a bit dissappointing. Of course I'm feeling fat seeing photos of myself in a bathing suit. Although according to these guys I'm fine. I guess I just need to do some sit ups. But with our AC out my activity level needs to be at a minimum.

Posted by katiek at 4:53 PM

May 21, 2004

Passing the Torch

I'm so proud!! I have done a very parental thing yesterday, I put my son's crayon scribbles on the fridge! I know I will raise Josiah to love art and to love to color and be creative but it's something different to actually see him doing it. I didn't teach him, in fact I gave up on the crayons for a while because all he did was eat them. It must be his grandma, I found evidence in my kitchen on the junk mail pile. Pictures of kitties and his name written out in big bold letters. It's a great chapter of childhood. Gaze and enjoy the new master!
Yeah, so about my artwork. I have completely changes directions with the Ruth Perkins Project. I was going to do a triptych and start with my standard balck canvases. But that didn't work. The black made the memorial a bit too... black, and that's not what Ruth was and is. I also tried to do something that maybe shouldn't be done. I made a collage out of other collages. Ouch, that was rough. I know some of my best work is created from mistakes but this had no chance. I also don't think I have the tools to paint a portrait from a fuzzy 1940's picture. I have all these hogshair brushes mostly around size 6 to 10 and my blending brushes are large too. And if y'all haven't noticed, I don't paint fuzzy portraits, leave that up to Thomas Kincade wannabees. I now have a 18"x24" canvas primed with a rose color. It looks very cozy and memorable, it looks like a loving grandmother color, very feminine and antiqued. I think this color will be friendlier.

Posted by katiek at 4:46 PM

May 10, 2004

Constantly Scoulding

I feel like a psycho. Like I am not normal but I just think that order is necessary. My kid is not a huge discipline problem, hopefully he never will be but as I look into the future I worry that I will just be scoulding and yelling nothing else. I have had a bad outlook on stuff lately and a bit of a doomsday thought on my mind.

Order, children need order, so when do you break out the "I'm a fun kindergarden teacher type" and put away the "I'm the headmaster at the catholic school" thing? See, there are a bunch of neighborhood boys that hang out next door: the Chucky Cheese house. I don't think they all belong there but they are there almost every day between 2:30 and 6pm. I let them play in my backyard one day last week and now, no stopping them. See -ORDER- I want to set boundaries. I'm a freak I know it but these children should not be allowed to run freely into my yard, on my back porch, into my kitchen whenever they want. And they will if I don't lock the door.

findahappyplacefindahappyplacefindahappyplacefindahappyplacefindahappyplace.....
I had three beautiful pink roses growing on a wild bush at the foot of our deck and I picked the only one that was ready. I went out later today to get diapers and they were gone!! Picked off!! Now, what is that about? Did a three or six year old boy pick my roses? They didn't just dissappear! So that's it, I have officially locked my gate the best I can and I will be setting rules for them when they come.

1) No entering the house.
2) No playing on the deck: If you've seen our deck it's not really safe-it doesn't have sides.
3) Only play in my yard when I am home and you've asked me.
4) Make sure your mom (or guardian) knows where you are.
5) No picking on my kid: yes we did have a problem with this last time.

Am I psycho?! I think this will make things better right! As long as I am the adult and the yard owner I should right? Man I'm screwed....

Posted by katiek at 4:42 PM

March 29, 2004

Furry Happy Monsters

Yes, I take a brief mid morning break to watch TV while doing paperwork, blogging, etc.. and this morning before my shower and Josiah's nap we watched Sesame Street. To my complete surprise R.E.M. made an apperance on the children's TV show today! Now while everyone else was getting into grunge hardcore in the 90's, I was still a major R.E.M. fan. I wore my Out of Time album out! And it took me a long time to figure out what Michael Stipe was singing on that Star Me Kitten song on Automatic for the People (which I believe I never got back after I dated Joshi briefly in highschool). I was so naive! But now! Ten years later, I see my favorite band on Sesame Street singing "Shiny Happy People" BUT with altered lyrics to be "Furry Happy Monsters" I roared with laughter as Michael, Peter, and Mike bounced around with a room full of one eyed, one horned, flying, purple people eaters! It made my day! I enjoyed Robert DeNiro talking with Elmo about what it means to be an actor, I also found it amusing to see Liam Neeson(sp?) say the Alphabet with Ernie but this took the cake!!

Speaking of cake. Jenny and I threw our husbands a rip-roaring good time for their birthday. It was a surprise so I couldn't post the planning bits, but it was well worth it! We had a cowboy theme (see above picture). I found cowboy hats and cowboy deco's. John loves Rocky Road so Jenny got a Rocky Road cake from Bruster's. I made Joel some butter cream cupcakes.Being that I was the hostess I didn't get many pictures but I'm sure you can check out Andy's blog or his website and see some pictures. Andy got Joel some cool presents like a Super Speed way racetrack. We played the Cereal Box Limbo which the Perkins were the winners, but Holly was quite impressive with her flexibility!! We played this game at Joel's 25th birthday party in Bergen Norway and it was a hit, so I was sure it would be good fun again. It helps to have Buena Vista Social Club playing to get you in the Limbo mood!!

VSN last night was good. I feel the Lord is really bringing some women into my life that are important. I met a girl named Brittnay and she was refreshingly honest about herself and I look forward to seeing her and I hope she gets plugged in. But Jenny and Jennie, and Erin H are young women who I look forward to the many facets of what these relationships will bring. I feel no responsibility for why these women are around me so much but I am thankful that I don't feel so isolated anymore.

Yesterday we also went to Holly's daughter Emma's birthday party. She's 3. She pranced around in her pretty pink dress, we ate a yummy pink icecream cake, and I was happy to meet her dad finally, Daniel. We also met Emma's grandma's and they were happy to meet all of us. It was a beautiful day at Marietta Square.
So today I'm glad to rest, but I will get my painting stretched, the one I've been showing, so I can enter it in a show this weekend. I need to also make a business card and write a bio and an artist statement. Whew! No rest for the weary! I also need to get together with Holly to get some more CPF's for Polar Babies covers. And Erin H wants to get together during the day soon. Judah Maurer turns one this week- that party is Wednesday night.
Image: Diapers on my new clothesline.

Posted by katiek at 4:16 PM

February 19, 2004

Out of the Woods

Well I thought I was out of the woods. Josiah had been happy for having a puikey day on Tuesday and a feverish day on Wednesday. He ate breakfast, he played and after an experimental lunch of chicken broth (ok no you don't want that) potatoes (ok you really don't want that) jello (ok you love that but it has NO nutritional content) so..... apples! (oh honey, don't gag!) I eventually threw all wisdom out the window and gave him some Mac and Cheese. He loves it and it's better than Jello...sorta. Well off to Kroger we went fun fun! As we arrived home I let Josiah try my chocolate shake he gagged and puiked all over the front stoop. Better than Krogers floor. Poor little guy. So he has nothing left in his tummy. I just put him down for a nap and he fell asleep on my chest moaning and talking to his big red ball: "buh buh ruuuuh buh". He breathes loudly blowing snot bubbles up and down from his nostril. His long skinny legs stradle my waist. So I quick rock upward and swoop him to his crib. My boy is so beautiful when he sleeps. And one good thing about a sick child is they become your snuggly baby again.

Posted by katiek at 3:40 PM

February 18, 2004

Getting Started

I have a bit a down period so what better way to use it than to create a weblog! My son Josiah has been sick which means that everything gets put on hold. I can't say I've been feeling well either. So to begin, I've been wanting to do this for a while ever since I followed Amelia J's entrance on Loobylu. My in laws are in the Philipines and this will be great for them to see too.

I've been a stay at home mama for a year now. My husband and I have just bought a construction site of a house that some days we grow quite tired of. Maybe I'll get some photos of the wreakage up soon. Josiah had to learn how to play in a box until we got the kitchen floor down. I love it though, never been a home owner and painting walls, buying blinds and shelves. woo hoo! it's a blast. I painted our ratty old hutch that we bought for our first apartment in Fort Oglethorpe GA almost 5 years ago and we always said "we'll paint it". Now I finally have and it's a dream- so lovely. Oh the things that thrill me. But yesterday and today I've been hibernating warding off the 24 stomach bug ewww. I hope this blog will give me a chance to voice creative thoughts. I need to get back into all my creative outlets, i.e. painting, graphic design ( quite a challenge)

Well that's all for now. I'm feeling a bit queezy....

Posted by katiek at 3:34 PM